Penesive Of "The Frog"

ITP

2006-03-30T22:44:00.000-08:00

31st March 2006 (week 4)

This week has been an eventful week full of reactions (big and small) and too many things done to be recorded. However, one particular thing I did stood out – column chromatography.

Although best done using test tubes , it is usually not done that way because of the amount of time needed and sometimes it was deemed un-necessary as other simpler alternatives can be found. However, for the sake of knowing how a true columns really runs, dr sudhakar(boss) allowed me to tried using test tubes. And when I say tubeS , I mean it plurally, and its many many tubeS.

So I allowed the column to run, while monitoring for any sign of compound coming out of the column via Thin layer chromatography (TLC) – crude – but nevertheless serving its sole purpose of just informing the user whether any compound has eluted.

When the first drop of TLC confirmed a substance was coming out, boss showed me a rack of test tubes (32) and told me to use them (which he later changed his mind about it as it was suspected to be contaminated) , I thought at that time “ would I be needing so many tubes?”, and I only took approximately 20 at that time. So I started collecting the eluents from the column. To my surprise, it would appear that my column was moving at 1 mili-meters(mm) per hour, it was so slow that by the time I was due for home, I had 80 test tubes covered in aluminium foil in which nearly 60 of them were filled – my column still unfinished.

The next day (today , 31st ) , I continued to collect the column eluent until the max count of test tubes reached 85 – a career high for myself - , and I thought 10 test tubes back in the secondary school days were enough.

The next part didn’t come as a surprise, nevertheless still a psychological blow . I had to do thin layer chromatorgraphy for alternate test tubes (god bless) to check whether the compound was the same . And so I did, and trust me – believe me – it was an enjoyable experience , but taxing on the mind. It drew away my energy for the rest of the day, and made me commit some mistakes I shouldn’t have made.

For example, I was supposed to air dry a solution to isolate the solid, I accidentally over-pressured the air tube causing my material to “jump” out of the vial it was in!(good thing it was only a little) . I was feeling lethargic the whole day after that.

However, if you were to ask me if I am willing to do the column again, I would say yes. I think its really once-in-a-life-time and I might not ever get to do it again, that very thought just makes me cherish today’s experience of column chromatography.

Yu Song

IMRE attachment

2006-03-22T20:06:00.000-08:00

23 March 2006

Its been a while since i last blogged, mainly due to the fatigue after work (under attachment).

Work has been tiring - nevertheless fun - for me for the past 3 weeks (after this week) . Its something like a dream come true (if they start paying me 4 digits pay :P) , but for the most parts, it was a great experience(and it will continue to be i believe).

I have not seen such high-technological anywhere before, not to mention the easy availability of the chemicals , although all those coupled with the amount of hazards we're exposed to everyday.

I had to attend a EHS(environmental health safety) course (2 days) before i can officially work in the lab. That alone ate up 7 working days of mine! Although troublesome, EHS training is something absolutely neccessary, not only for the EHS part, also for the bonding between new students-staff alike.

The most important concern for me however - and as i anticipated - is basketball. It has always taken up my life for the most parts of it, however now, it has became a minority in my life. this is both annoying and frustrating, although i completely understand that it is a adaptation process that must take place in order to become a greater person. I am trying to juggle both basketball and work together, and i think its gradually getting better for me as i am able to play 2 days per week (trust me, its nothing compared to before work but its something) .

Another problem that has been encountered is fatigue, its a strange thing, but you get psychologically tired which directly (or indirectly) affects your physological(physical) state. Its hard to sleep at 10.30 pm(and somehow always get delayed:P) and wake up at 7 am just in order to make it in time to the work area @ 9 am - its okay once in a blue moon, but do that for 5 days/week, its not exactly interesting.

I am not whining tho, i wouldnt give up anything less in exchange for the colleagues(and mates) in my company , the things i learn and experience, its just absolutely wonderful! I think this has definitely shaped my life to be more organised than before and it has helped me to set my life in perspective for the new and up-coming semester.

Meanwhile, i'll try to blog more often and so i am able to look at my penesive when i need to re-collect this memory:)

p.s i am attached to Institude of material research and engineering(IMRE) pronounced as (I-ME-RE)

ryan's tag

2006-03-07T03:02:00.000-08:00

hmmm... i got tagged by ryan...

The Rules: The first player of this game starts with the topic 5 weird facts about yourself, and people who get tagged need to write an entry about their 5 weird facts as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Do not forget to leave a comment that says, You are tagged in their blog and tell them to read yours.recent 5 weird things :

1. I feel i am gonna fall sick every other day..

2. I've very much rather play basketball 24/7 if my sleeping mechanism didnt kick in

3. I treat my band of brothers with great love:) something that never happened before:)

4. I am beginning to like checking my emails after my attachment started

5. I begin to realise that everything i ever desired was everything i had

Next 6 person i tag..

Cheong Yew (Ng)
Jia Wei (prince)
Chee Liong (foo)
Candice
Pei kun (chee)
Rui Cheng (sam)

good luck!

memorable quotes

2006-03-02T08:00:00.000-08:00

memorable quotes from one of my all time favourite movie, Terminator II

Watching John with the machine, it was suddenly so clear. The Terminator would never stop, it would never leave him. And it would never hurt him, never shout at him or get drunk and hit him or say it was too busy to spend time with him. It would always be there and it would die to protect him. Of all the would-be fathers who came and went over the years, this thing, this machine was the only one who measured up. In an insane world, it was the sanest choice.
The above quote called out to compassion . The machine is compassion, it should never stop, never leave anybody, of all the things i learned ever, this thing, compassion, the only quality really valuable, although an insane value viewed by many, is the sanest value i cherish

The future, always so clear to me, had become like a black highway at night. We were in uncharted territory now, making up history as we went along.

The above quote shows me how we always think we know what to do , but really do we? Something can happen, anything. you never know.

I know now why you cry. But it's something I could never do.

Most touching quote.. Many times we understand what we MUST do.. although we done like it we have to..

The unknown future rolls toward us. I face it for the first time with a sense of hope, because if a machine, a terminator, can learn the value of human life, maybe we can, too.

I just plainly love this quote. I think its impressive that if someone as simple as an ant and a frog is able to cherish life, i dont see why we cant learn the value of what we have around us. The future is not know, but we must face it with a sense of hope!

The future is not written, There is no fate but what we make for ourselves.

simplified: No fate, but what we make

Self explainatory.

Engineering Maths II exams....

2006-02-27T05:14:00.000-08:00

27th Febuary 2006 , Monday , 2110 hours

Today was one of the most meaningful and stressful day of my revision for my exams..

The subject i am doing revision for is engineering maths two(AKA A-Maths integrations upgraded) . It was indeed a stressful however always eventful and rewarding. I was due for class at 1 pm @ T731 with mrs tung and my class.

It was interesting considering that gordon and i arrived in the classroom being the only two students that was there at first. Shortly, after the others started to came in. But the maximum head count for that day was 6 . Sad. However, it only goes to us , those there , because the teacher had more time for each individial.

I completed THREE past year papers (and one thats only half done) , from 11.30 am to 8.30 pm , I am in such a state of fatigue (mental) that i cant even calculate 2(2x2) - 1, looks easy? Believe me, i used a calculator to do that. . The level of mental fatigue was at its threshold, push it any further and you can start digging a 6 ft cavity for my future.

Anyway i am glad i finished 3 past year papers (a feat in my opinion) and master all the questions! THats great news.

Benjamin accompanied me pretty much throughout my studying period and i have him to thank for my un-explained phenomenol long "Staminia" .

I am too tired to continue on this now.

But heed this,

Engineering Maths II is scheduled for termination on 28th febuary 2006, 11 10 hours.

:)

Tribute To All

2006-02-22T04:03:00.000-08:00

Life has changed dramatically for me, something which i noticed , was that i am beginning to know more friends and not only that, i think i i gradually bonding very well with these cool people. I credit this change to my friends and to myself. I once read "A change in your heart is enough to fix your life" (i.e To change what you get, change yourself).

As a tribute to my friends who made this possible i am going to put them on my blog! They include (but not limited to)(and in no order)

Kenny - your approach to basketball and life really got my respect
Chee Liong - Your cheerfulness is awfully contagious
Ryan - Your timely sense of humour always brightens up everyone
Shun Fu - Your immense ability to comphrehend thinks awes me
Shi Long - Your ability to think is your greatest gift
Benjamin - Your silent attitude to life has taught me a great deal
Gideon - You have taught me the ability to listen, forgive and forget
Prince - You have shown me a new outlook to life
Anthony - Your immense ability to precieve is simply uncomphrehensible
Pei Kun - Your ability to laugh at whatever people throws at you is amazing

And to everyone else not mentioned, it doesnt mean you're forgotten!!

I thank these people (and the rest of you out there) for the life i have now. You make my day everyone of you . Hope to see more of you guys! Especially ppl from my tian feng! Do post more in the forum!

Sad sad day...

2006-02-16T03:32:00.000-08:00

Todays is one of the worst days i ever had. I think its been a long time since i felt this way.

Today (thur 16/feb/06) , I went with a joyous feeling to coach my team "tian feng", i actually got to coach this team through my cousin, and every training i was pretty excited as its my life long dream to coach. My mom wanted me to cancels today training because i had two upcoming tests tommorrow (Fri) , one is Trace And Transition metals, the other effective use of logic in arguments. Huge modules, high weightage for both. I spent the whole morning mugging on books (woke up at 7am) so i could get off to coach during the noon time, little did i expect that my notion to do this caused my life's utter disappointment.

As 3.15 approached, i was curious as to whether the players have arrived, (they had a test till 3 pm) so i called on of my players (who was living beside the court in a HDB flaT) , he said he would get changed immdiately and come down. Seeing that i am a 20minutes bus journey away, i quickly decided to hail a cab(together with gideon) to rush to the training area. When i got there, i only saw two people - utter disappointment (there were supposed to be at least four). But i told myself, "its okay, they'll come"

And came they did , all was present (total of 7 people) and i started the day's drill!

First was the usual, warm up, and running. They did fine at that, i was pretty satisfied with that.

Then came the next drill, i divided them into two groups to have them do a little competitive drills, i gave a few simple instructions, stand at either 3 spots and SHOOT THE BALL . i said , each of you are to make a given number of shots and depending on whose time limit is the best wins, the other will get punish ( i allowed them to choose the punishment before hand and what punishment they get will be decided by drawing poker cards out of a deck).

there was one three person grp and one four person grp, i said, three person grp make 20, 4 person grp make 30,they grumbled that it was unfair. Truly? Did you think this drill is for you to see whos better? Obviously, if you are REALLY BETTER, it wouldnt be no problem ? And they started grumbling it was unfair bla bla bla, so i changed it to, fourth person sit out and 3 on 3 ,shoot from any spot, one person one minute. So the team that lost had to be punished (ran 7 rounds) .

Second drill, pass screen, recieve, pass screen recieve, a basic concept i told them, 4 person on a court, spread evenly 2 basic principles
1)You cannot pass the ball back to the person who passed to you
2) The reciever must have been screened or help to screen before recieving the ball.

And they cant even do it! And i was aware that some of them was not serious at all.. I told them what to do and they actually argued that "aiya no need la we know what to do" and i was like "heck since you know what to do , do you still need a coach?" , I felt truly upset by that because, i gave much time and energy to come up with all this drills and jeopardise my test's results to come and train you guys and you tell me this kind of thing? i was truly truly upset.

After that, eventually i tied the game, although it was one group who won, i lied to them that they were tied. Seriously, up till that point, i just wanted to switch off on them. And god blessed , it rained!

But i didnt go back, i wanted to give them one more chance.. so i told them, 50 free throws, (which eventually got cut to 10) , if the ball hit the ball thrice,.. you run suicides. (which later got cut to running the length of the court only) . They dropped the ball SIX TIMES, and they didnt run... I was truly disappointed them, i was HURT.

I just didnt want to continue, at this point, the rain got bigger so i said training stopped.

Later the rain subsided(but floor abit wet still) so i said, okay lets play (i am no longer coach) and i was SHOCKED to realise that their improvment was so little.. (if any at all... really) , i was disappointed, especially those who PROMISED me they would work hard, 3 weeks defeat that person, 2 weeks start doing this, 1 month start becoming that.. its been 3 weeks , and all i see, is a messy puzzle shuffled into a messier puzzle . Will it ever be solved? I dont know.

I failed as a coach, i given up everything i can, time for my family, time for studies, time for friends and time for myself to coach them for free. Should i continue to do this? I guess i should get some rest before deciding what to do next...

I dont know.. they say, the future is not written, there is not fate but what we make for ourselves..

but truly i ask, is one sided effort suffice to overall improvement? I doubt - it takes two hands to clap.

Sickness Woes

2006-02-01T21:20:00.000-08:00

Hi people, its been a long time since i last blogged. Mainly because - i am sick. And i always had this strange attitude that, i love to document about my sickness after i got well. This enabled me to look back at my days of sickness, and rejoice in my present healthy state.

Being sick is never anyones favourite past time, however, i learnt a new lesson today. That is that , we learn new lessons by getting sick. In buddhism, buddha said everything has a cause, in christianity, god says everything is arranged for a reason. So i guess, getting sick is part and parcel of life. And when in started to adopt this attitude, it makes me feel that i have indeed learnt something.

Firstly, i was down with throat/respiratory tract/lung problems. In lay man term : Asthma triggered by sore throat.
That means, i cant talk alot. Whenever i start to talk alot, i start to cough alot, and that feels really bad (try coughing every 10 seconds) . So i began to stop talking alot, and think alot instead. I thought of what i WOULD have said if i were able to, and alas, i realised how many foolish things i would have said if not for my sore throat!

People always like to say , "think before you talk" , this sentence is a household statement, you probably heard of it. But for myself, it goes as deep as a rock can drill a diamond . I never know what it meant to "think" before you "talk" . But now i do, it really means to put yourself in the other persons shoes and ask , if i were him, what would have made me said this? Is it because of this? or that?

Very often, we're quick to point out others mistakes because of the personality, but when the same things happen to us, we're quick to blame the situation - This is known as attribution error.

For example, if you were late for lessons, you've probaly say, the MRT left the moment i arrived at the platform, or the traffic jammed up etc etc But when we see someone else gets late , we'll very quickly say things like " Hes being irresponsible", "Hes never punctual" etc After doing some deep thinking, i realise this is indeed how people behave, but is it really the best way to think? Not for me, this type of thinking is instinctive , not logical.

Perhaps I should start contemplating how i treated others before, maybe i wasnt listening enough, thats why i got asthma relapse? i dont know, but i know, there must be a reason why i fell sick. And now that i know why, i am recovering. Coincidence? Maybe.

But you know what they say

"Theres only a thin line of difference between coincidence and fate , my friend "- Medjia on O'Connor (the mummy returns)

Bye Procrastination

2006-01-12T20:07:00.000-08:00

Hi guys sup! Today i am going to say good bye to a good old friend whom has been with me since the day i remembered. Probably still the best friends of many and probably will continue to be.

How should i describe this friend of mine? This friend of mine makes me feel really good everytime i get around him, I can do whatever i want, and if i could put it cloest to words it'll be "Freedom in heaven on earth". I forget most of my problems and just enjoy. But this friend of mine isnt my shadow so when it leaves, i tend to have bigger problems , and this snowballs into many other things. And this friend of mine - although to blame , never gets blamed.

This friend of mine has a pretty long name too! Hes called PROCRASTINATION.

Shades of him still lingers in me, but i am trying to forget whatever he has taught me - like trying to dry off in the sun after a dip in the sea - it takes time!

My first order without procrastination was that i was able to study for a test(ENVSTB) which was postphoned (and WAS postphoned thanks to my dear friend and my lecturer kindness of course:D). I decided from then , i was going to start getting things done. I was going to study in a systematic way, such that, my life will not be affected drastically and yet i am still able to do the test with 100% confidence. And it worked. I studied all the chapters throughout the weekend, and finished it (mind mapping etc) . During mondays , tuesdays and wednesdays, i read through whatever i mapped out and i only spent 30-45 mins per day doing so (its interesting, mindmaps makes what would take 2 hours to re-read everything) .

Benefits i got from this:

i was able to play the games i wanted during the "hours i got" from mindmapping (as it lessen my study time and increased my ability to remember the facts)

i was able to go for basketball games on wednesday night and i was able to stay back in school during thursday to play basketball (indoor). - the test was on friday

Amazing when my teacher once told me he went shopping one day before his O levels. I thought he was "shitting" me then, now i know, all he did was be systematic , say bye to procrastination and he did what he wanted to. AMAZING

And its interesting that when i procrastinated i almost usually never get things done.

For example, last year , i needed to do a report. I had 4 weeks. (believe it or not, i ended up taking only 2 horus to complete it) . i procrastinated for the first 3 1/2 weeks. Come to think of it, i didnt really particularly enjoyed those moments, as many was wasted doing nonsensical things like surfing for the sake of surfing the internet, and playing games which was totally boring.

The thing about being systematic is that you are able to organise your time so that you will be able to maximise your efficiency in life . When you're free, do what you like and what you need .

When i was able to do that , i realise

" You have to do what you need to be able to enjoy doing what you want "

" When you procrastinate, you do what you dont enjoy and pay later by rushing to do what you need"

Keys to stop procrastination ( i used this steps to stop myself from procrastinating)

1) Set a goal
Always have a target and "vision" of what you do. for example, i asked myself (for the ENVSTB test) what kind of life can i get if i started to study instead of waiting for the eleventh hour i realised

--> I was able to enjoy myself in the afternoon and play basketball in the noon (as all my schedules falls on night) and i was able to do this EVERYDAY as far as i stuck to my schedule. and get good grades

I told myself, thats GREAT. and then i asked, what kind of life i would get if i procrastinate?

--< I will be able to do whatever i want everyday , but on thursday, i will have a bad bad day trying to cram all my notes and get all frustrated, i wont be able to concentrate on the lessons on friday (test was @ 11am) before the test (as i would be frantically studying) .

i compared the two. I took the first option.

2) Spread your workload
A important aspect to say goodbye to our friend is to spread your work evenly, do a bit everyday, and you'll find great results

3) Do your work efficiently

EVerything i do, i want it to get done efficiently, i started to understand myself, i was clear of one thing, i dont study well reading from notes. I will lose focus easily when i just sit down and stare down on the notes. I know it, and i am not able to fall into this trap that is literally a booby trap placed right in my eyes.

I would do mindmaps (and enjoy it) . I was able to link all the pts and i converted 20+ pages of lecture notes to 4 pages of revision notes. You know why they call it lecture notes? Because they are used for lecturers, not revision.

Yep hopefully a few years when i look back at this entry, i would be able to still remember the days when is struggled with procrastination.

(p.s remember how wonderful it is to go for wednesday training w/o worrying about a thing! De wei taught you how to be a "thinking player" and you absorbed. Lets not forget the algae near the baseline shall we:( and build a indoor court soon!)

Worries & Listening

2006-01-12T00:06:00.000-08:00

These days i have been doing alot of reflection upon myself and it dawned on me that, i havent live life to its fullest, i tried to do the best in everything , and its an over-statement to say i have done my best.(not just try)

The three things i need to learn are (note this blog entry is for future reference)

1) Stop Worrying
2) Start Listening
3) Show Respect

WORRYING

I use various methods to stop myself from worrying and be happy.

One of the methods i used is, whenever something happens (or might happen)

I take 3 steps :

1) I ask myself, "what is the worst to happen?"
2) Accept the worst scenario
3) Improve upon the worst scenario

These work for minor worries , i would like to illustrate what happened today:

I had training at 7.30pm at night(bball), i was worried it'll rain and i wont be able to train and i'll therefore be upset! I started worrying, staring into the skies,praying for the clouds to go and "picturing" the perfect training night. I was expecting the best, perfection, idealism. I accepted it, and would accept no other. Thats why i feel sad when i think its going to rain

Its funny how we humans do things exactly opposite of the "real" way of getting results.

What i did above, would

1) not solve my problem
2) give me more problem
3) Waste my time

What i did was, i simply asked myself these:

Q1) what was the worst to happen?

A1) It would rain , and i probably would stay at home and not train

Q2) Can you accept that?

A2) Yep, i guess its possible to, afterall i have been through worst

Q3) How can i improve upon the worst?

A3) If it doesnt rain, training goes.If it does, i probably can spend my time studying, surfing the net, and play games. --> I have been through worst

Worries gone. Problem solved

(Only works for MINOR problems)

Its amazing how we worry about something , we go in circles, instead of solving problems we make more out of it.

Take for example, i used to worry i couldnt do well for physics, i start to worry what if i fail.. what if i dont catch what the teacher says... what if...

I adopt another better method to solve my worries:

1) Get facts right
2) Analyse facts
3) Solve problem

In my case, i first made a list of why i cant do well in physics a list would look like...

List and analysis
( 1. I never paid attention in class)
( 2. I dont do enough revision )
( 3. Too much TV!!! )

Solving it

1. I will pay more attention in class
2. I will prepare before every and after every lesson
3. TV time cut

Problem solved, worries gone. Grades went up. Everyone was happy.

Did it help me by worrying what would happen ? NO!

Worrying solves nothing

(for more on worrying read the book "How to stop worrying and start living"- Dale Carnegie)

Listening

Big . I mean listening is. Listening is a skill that surpass all other that i need to pick up.I often thought , heck why listen? Is it neccessary? But now i know, listening is a skill so important, i would re-take my O levels if i could master this skill.

Sounds absurd? I probably would think so if i were you. It never dawned on me till i started to realise, how little i was listening. I only know 2 things before

1) I wanted to be heard
2) I didnt want to hear

Selfish? Right on

Most people (normal) are like you and i, we like to be heard, but we never like to listen , sounds perfect? Sages dont think so look:

"What goes around , comes around"

"Do unto others what you would do unto yourself"

Sounds familiar? YEP. Correct. I should start listening and stop talking alot.

Listening means acceptance of what the others say , not to judge. (I believe, that, we should never judge another, for we dont know them . We aint them, we didnt went through what they did etc. If we were them, we've probably do the same.) You would be surprise, i was. When i started to listen, people feel better, feels happier. ANd so do i!:)

I think from before, i always feel ppl didnt listen to me enough, and they were all whiners.

I always thought i was right, my opinion must be heard, whatever that doesnt suit what i think is wrong and i have every right to condemn it.

Now i know, to listen is a gift, to accept is also a gift. There is no absolute right or wrong. Acceptance (by listening) is crucial to builing good human relationship.

If i always think i am right, and start thinking everyone is LIKE ME(When they aint) , i am in for a hell load of trouble.

Always felt your dad never understood a single word you said? Always felt your mom nags too much?
Because they assume you are as matured as them, when you ARE NOT. You're 18, hes/shes well twice your age.

But if they listen , and we listen too, things WILL change. Acceptance (by listening) is crucial to building good human relationship.

Strange isnt it, we think that by being heard we get things done? But really, by listening we get things done.

Its funny how we humans do things exactly opposite of the "real" way of getting results.

Well thats all for myself, ys.

(p.s If you're seeing yu song, remember, Stop worrying, you have a greater cause , start listening, for your cause is that)

A day when things got done

2006-01-05T02:08:00.000-08:00

These days have been busy filled with ups and downs, well one would say "hey yo , thats life, suck it up and get aon with it" , and yes thats exactly what i told myself. At least i am happy about the things that hasnt gone way too wrong, like , i stayed healthy, injury free (touch wood) , and basically everyone around me too. Many other things like , no financial problems, no relationship (bgf) problems, well the list goes on.

Some of you observant eyes would have caught the title of my "new" blog, known as the "penesive" for those harry potter fans should know what it is, those who dont

A penesive is a basin(filled with odd liquid) where you place your thoughts(which appears like silvery streams) into. And when you want to "re-live" that thought, you extract it out.

Well, i dont think science has caught up with our creativity, but basically its a way of recording down everything we feel/think bla down and reliving it later.

I have read a few of my posts from more than a year ago, and i realise what a arrogant kid i was, yes two key words

ARROGANT

KID

I probably punch myself in the face if i didnt know that person was me. I guess its hard to see your own mistakes when you're surronded by thoughts that others are not always right. Needa change

WEDNESDAY(4th Jan)
Nothing significant happened today, but couldnt get use to the 4 straighth (2 hour 2 hour) lecture, and shades of unattentiveness slipped in from time to time, but overall it still worked out fine . Managed to pass the lesson absorbing most of the things taught, but probably by now,forgotten some bits here and there

THURSDAY(5th jan) AKA TODAY

Today was a slighty wee fair bit more "interesting" than yesterday, couldnt sleep today morning(after 2359 hours is thursday liao!) slept finally at 3 am or so, but woke up at 7.10 am, astounding myself , i didnt really felt tired, but yea, probably slept well.

Went to school to meet my "mentor" and he gave me some advise to human relationship and i truly appreciate whatever he said. But i think i didnt appear too intereseted, but i WAS. I was just so deep in my own thoughts that i probably appeared daze or uninnterested (which wasnt the case)

After that travelled up to the lab @ T223 to look for minghan to gather some notes from ENVSTB (Environmental Studies B) , and there were these "gossips" about requests to postphone the test . Well minghan and i wanted to go to the teacher's office (mr kwok chen ko), however, because he was still having his practical therefore he couldnt make it. So i had to go alone.

Well at mr kwok office i told him the wishes of the class to postphone the test(or the majority of them) , i think it would truly be hard for mr kwok to postphone the test, because i mean, its already set and its not very fair to those who already have studied like..

May Choo
Joanne
Wan Qi
Gordon

But they were kind enough to agree to the postphone and i am sure everyone is greatful to that.

So i went around asking for signatures(As requested by mr kwok, EVERYONE must sign), and finally got it done and sealed the case nicely:)so test postphoned.

Just a while ago, i had a good chat with my coach + team-mate + friend and he agreed to coach my "team" ! i am so happy, hopefully the otheres will agree to it:)

cheers

new blog, new life

2006-01-04T07:22:00.000-08:00

Today i changed my blog settings, yea u guessed it, now all past archives are VIEWABLE and readable:)
i hope you guys enjoy it and of course comments are very much welcomed:)

New year, new term, new resolutions everythings new. My resolution for 2006 is simple

1) Do well in exams through hard work(bye procrastination buddy)
2) Stay Healthy
3) Work hard on my bball game
4) Improve my human relationship (with everyone)

Well all doable except the 4), been there done that, resolution everytime a new term/year/semester starts, always fail. I aint blaming nobody no more, blame myself.Got myself to work, read a few books, tried a few things, still trying

I guess the problem with me is/was/are/were that i always blamed everyone around me, i assume 100% of the time i am 101% correct. Not going to happen no more i told myself , bill clinton was 75% of the time right, he ran a country, and mind you, a big one. Most people are 55% right most of the time, so what makes me 100%? i guess not.

Too many times too often, i blame ppl for everything, w/o reflecting on my own actions, from today, i'll put myself in people's shoes when something doesnt seem right, i am not going to blame anyone, but myself. (this goes deep wont explain )

And i also realise,

"the one way to be sure you tell someone that hes absolutely right, is to tell him hes absolutely wrong"

Whether the other party is right/wrong, by saying hes wrong, is telling him hes right, you know, human mechanism - self defence. Even the law says its okay to employ self-defence :D

So from today, i shall not blame anyone, and i shall reflect upon my every action.

i'll try (due to restriction on internet time tostudy!!!) to post 1 thing i should NOT have done or could do better online every weekday.

Things i shouldnt have done today: ( ) = thoughts

1) Shouldnt have countered a answer directed from Zhi Ying to our Teacher

Teacher: So does octahedral molecules have equitorial and axial positions?

Zhi Ying : yes

Me:No (thinking: its in the notes!)

Teacher: Repeats Question

Zhi Ying : Yes

Me: No(for godsake read your notes!)

What i COULD HAVE done:

Teacher : So does octahedral molecules have equitorial and axial positions?

Zhi Ying: Yes

Me: *silence* ( he probably has a point as to why he said yes, and he would learn two things , 1 hes wrong, 2 why he was wrong as opposed to myself which only learn one thing 1 why its correct.I should proably employ more thinking myself when questions are posted, instead of just accepting answers)

new shooting form

2005-12-27T06:04:00.000-08:00

Hi folks, sry i wanted to update the other time but somehow blogger had a bug and the rest is pretty much history.

Well after 4 days of stopping basketball due to CHRISTMAS, i went back to the court to find myself in a shooting slump, i shot like a newbie and i didnt like it.

So i have decided to adopt a new shooting style, well i was very comfortable with it and i hope it helps.

Whatever helped however, the weather was definitely against me, as the saying goes

"human proposes, heaven disposes", it rained THREE times , everytime i thought the wrost was over - that is till the next downpour came AGAIN.

but hey i had a good time working on my shots, winning all the shooting competitions i had with my friends and is now currently pretty happy:)

but today wasnt just ALL BBALL ,i went to watch narnia the chrnoicles, wait its the chronicles of narnia:P

well pretty nice story, obviously christian orientated, but i really like it:) I got a bit disturbd how the lion died, felt naeuseous, no speical reasons, just nearly puked.

wont spoil the story for those who hasnt seen it:0

gd day!

e-learning week

2005-12-20T04:49:00.000-08:00

http://ibbab.free.fr/Joueurs/Jordan/images/jo_nodunk_jpg.jpg

bball

2005-12-15T04:47:00.000-08:00

Today (thur 15 dec) sunny

todays a pretty fun day on the overall, but also just a simple and plain day too.

It began with waking up at 6.10am due to i dont know? perhaps its because i didnt have to go to school today(as all lessons are either postphoned or ....) i did felt like a holiday!(something like a "pre-holiday" gift, as my holidays start next week). Whow does it feel good to just be able to stay at home for a while enjoying a game between the phoenix suns and the dallas mavericks on tape and eating twiggies which cost me 0.80 cents, and guess what, i tried a new flavour, vanilla. Didnt taste very nice:/ but the sweetness of the morning dew in suspended in the air coupled with a holiday mood sure did help to lighten up my mood!:)

After that i had an appointment with my friends (chun hoe, jun jie, wei ren and shi long) at the court @ 8.30am, well i have always used to be early, but today i wanted to go down a bit earlier to take a few shots and work on a few things before they came, so i went there at 7.30am(that means i reached maybe about 7.40am) and started working on my shooting, well did gain a bit of experience doing a couple of things and find that i have got back my "soft touch", which i hope will last !

AS USUAL, all my friends were late, the earliest being at 8.35 am and the lastest being at 9.05 am, i didnt take kindly to that, but oh well, i guess thats that. The game didnt take too long, i went home at 12 am when i went to have lunch and when i reached home.. SLEPT. I slept from 3 pm to 6 pm, whow, did that feel shiok!:P

When i got up, i studied for tmr el tech test which i found to be not as much things to memorise as i imagined it to be, so it was all cooooooooool:)

and i am entering my blog entry which ... wait i am doing that now hehe:P

its my life

2005-12-12T16:45:00.000-08:00

Havent been updating alot these days, primarily because i have practically no thoughts to have to put down.

Just saw harry potter last week, i must say that the movie is twisted(in terms of order of events) and i am surprised that neville longbottom gave harry potter the GILLYWEED! Oh my poor dobby the house elf, wont even get a scene in this movie!:( wheres the love!

Apart from that, i think that movie was plain hilarious, of course you're gonna have to know what they're talking abuot(yea all this about singlish doesnt fit with american way of speaking) and then you gotta decipher what they're talking about (lots of plain sarcasm in it) . But well, thanks to years (around five years) of training with exposure to american culture,(thanks to a mud game , oh btw, mud stands for multi user dimension) , i was able to grasp the humour and i was laughing like Craaaazzzzzy ... oh course my pal (yi chuan) beside me was looking at me bewilered, like " is it so funny?" and the next minute(After my detailed explaination) he was laughing as bad as i was (wait maybe worse) .

Well after the little movie, i decided to have sushi for dinner (i just realised i had it for lunch :/ ), but well heck, i love it, been there done that, doing it again. Bought some sushi(ES) and before you knew it(even i was taken aback) i finished 8 sushi in what? 3 minutes? inform me of the next eating competition, i might just get myself a trophy.

Went home on the bus 180 , pretty uneventful until i realise i haevnt even TOUCH oh no, not even TOUCH yes you got that right, tape it, season it, seal it and send it to anyone who hears this, my trace and transistion(AKA inorganic chemistry) notes, and guess what folks? I have a test tomorrow! A look at the time on my face clock tells me its 2 hours to bedtime and here i am standing by my large wooden door in my adidas shoes (means i just got home --> for those who dont get it) .

Rushed in to study, i was practically cramming notes into my mind, i was like "okay this is that that is there there is what?" if you didnt know what i am talking about.... GREAT, because i didnt know what i was thinking about either that night.

So came the next day (Friday) , i sat for the test, and i was kinda relieved that they didnt test those questions that popped out of the corner of the notes (aka ulu ulu area) where i might have just MISSED a alphabet and *POOF* its 5 marks gone. . Thank god.

Then i went on to training (bball) after that, well i didnt exactly train, because once i got on the floor and started shooting around, my kneecapS was hurting like **** , and my ankle wasnt the best of it anyway, but anyway, the assistant coach (EX) came after a while and well, we had some fun , gave each other some love and i guess my absence didnt really had an "impact" on the prescence on the court oh well.

Praying i can go back to training soon :)

alright thats it for now!

mindfulness

2005-10-30T10:44:00.000-08:00

These days many thoughts has flew threw my mind and i have always always wondered , "why is it that time seems to pass so quickly , faster than the niagara falls and quicker than the concort" , this question is a tough one, but recently, i found the answer from a book.

This reason i will not speak from my point of view but i will briefly explain it and leave it as it is for your own intepretation.

Have you ever noticed that our mind never stays in one place? Our minds are like monkeys in the forest, they never stop at a certain spot other than for resting and for sleeping for that matter. In its active time, monkeys wander all over the place with no purpose nor cause. That is how our minds are like, we do not concentrate on what we are doing now but instead allow our minds to drift.

Let me quote you an example, lets say you are doing dishes for your family, does your mind stick on the dishes from the first to the last dish? Most probably not. Your mind drifts off to the newest video games you bought, to the best friends you had and to bedtime. You may think "ahh its easy to just stick on it", i would like to ask you to try it out and see for yourself, are you able to focus on the dishes and just that. ?

I realise that for myself, my mind has always been drifting, thats why i tend to get short-tempered, give un-called-for remarks, and being insensitive at times. This is because my mind isnt here , in the PRESENT, its either remembering the past of anticipating the future. If my mind sticks to the PRESENT, then i find that i am able to see things clearer as opposed to before.

I relate this exam to doing an exam, i had always found that time passes quickly when attempting exam questions, 2 hours isnt enough. Now hvae you ever wondered why?

For those whom find my threads intruguing and would like to have a share of what my exact thoughts are , please feel free to contact me @ satty20032003@yahoo.com.sg

As my thoughts may well lead you astray if i do not show you the original copy of the book i read. For those whom find me boring, i apologise for this plain thread:/

cya folks:)

me

2005-10-18T22:20:00.000-07:00

http://ibbab.free.fr/Joueurs/Jordan/images/jo_nodunk_jpg.jpg

THE GAME

2005-09-16T13:34:00.000-07:00

I had always love the game of basketball....

Some told me it was a teacher of life....

Some told me it was a waste of time.....

Some told me it was a hobby.....

But to me, its my life.

Michael jordan had always been my idol, granted hes the best player to ever play the game, hes one in a billion and one in a century, granted he has all the endorsements and shoe deals, granted he had all the freedom but many never thought about something, he lost his dad at 32. Went to play baseball, and came back greater than before.

What stumbled me really was how did he deal with his dad's death. I never really knew how he dealt with it, until i saw his video : Michael jordan to the MAX .

He talked about the death of his father and i was surprised how he actually saw it optimisstically(said to be passed on by his dad).

"I am just glad that i had a dad for 32 years in my life, to be part of my life, to help me make my decisions, not everybody has that" - Michael Jordan

Now i believe what others told me and how i have to turn off critics.

basketball IS a TEACHER of LIFE. I have my own thoughts on this matter. Basketball has taught jordan how to deal with failure , he fail more shots than he made, but he was more successful who was vice versa. Why? He dared to FAIL. He fails to succeed.

As for myself, i learned it from my coach. He taught me how to stay calm in games and not to let others affect your game. And he did it by example. He would always be smiling and never gave a hint that the game affected him, he boosts the team's morale and demoralised the opponents.

In life, its the same, you cant confront every situation, sometimes, you gotta sit back and relax, if you meet 10 arrogant people per day , you dont have the energy to deal with 10 of them everyday, you'll tire yourself out. Just sit back, let them do the talking, and you dont even have to listen. how great is that!

Hope all basketball players around and reading this can pay respect to your teacher of life, THE GAME

men and women

2005-09-15T21:49:00.000-07:00

Hello guys,

I have realised that people seems to boogle at how the opposite sex thinks. Have you
ever came across a scene where you go "what on earth does SHE want", or "HE doesnt care
for HER at all!" , notice i captitalised the SHE and HE. Why? Because , men and women are wired
differently. Lets face it here, we aint equal , but equitable.

Lets take a look at a bit of history *brings you back to the days of the cavemen*, the job of man
was to hunt, make woman pregnant ,ensure their tribe has food to eat, and stare in the fire. Their brains
are wired to HUNT, make woman PREGNANT , ensure tribe has food to EAT and STARE in the fire.
(bear these words in mind, i'll use them later)

How about women? Their job is to care for the house , get pregnant, prepare food and chit chat in their free time. Their brains are wired to CARE for the house, get PREGNANT , PREPARE food, and CHIT CHAT in their free time.

Now be brought back to modern day society. First, lets look at the common word PREGNANT, tho its the same word, its a totally different meaning to both sexes.

To men: Pass on his genes to the later generation, as fast and as diversified as possible.

MEANING: He'll go to bed with as many women he thinks is eligible to pass down the genes in the shortest time possible

To Women: To find a man who can take care of the family and settle down.

MEANING: She'll want to make sure the guy really loves her before going to bed with her.
Now you know why rape cases happens 90% to girls caused by man . Its simply instincts at work(i am not saying the man are not at fault, i am saying they cant control themselves)
Now you also know why guys are always known to "stare" , "ogle" at girls, its actually looking for the best fitting girl to pass on his genes.

Now you know why women look for "qualities" in man instead of "looks"

note: referring to overall population of girls/guys

okay now lets look at the various other keywords:

for men:

HUNT: This means looking for a job in the modern society, notice why guys are the ones always talking about careers and stuff like that. And hence fore, you would also realise that guys tend to be more focus on their jobs.

EAT: This also means that guys want to earn as much money as possible, no matter how their wives tell them they're happy and living comfortably, their quest for more money never seem to cease

STARE: This is the most interesting part, this is also why most guys are INSENSITIVE. Because they are not wired to be sensitive. Sensitivity is a GIRLS thing, it doesnt matter, they hunt in the day and by the time they get home, they just want to rest, sort out their problems by themselves (yes guys do not share problems among each other as they feel it makes them inferior) and sleep. Why the need to be sensitive? Its not part of their survival.
for women:

CARE: this explains why women are most of the time house-wives, they care for the home and want to take care of their children. well thats why they say, mother's love is always the greatest.

PREPARE: Same thing goes to show why they are mostly house-wives, they want to care for their home and children. yep

CHIT CHAT: once again, the most important point. Women love to chit chat among themselves. Because they have nothing to do at home, so all they do is talk. This has been brought to the modern society, notice why women always love to talk, in the toilet, everywhere. They also share their problems by talking, hence, when a women starts talking about how troublesome her day was, shes not trying to solve them, she just wants you to listen, she wants to be HEARD (this is also a way for men to show they care). So next time your wife/gf tells you how bad her day was , dont try to solve it, just listen and give appropriate comments.

Okay now to share my own view on men and women today, their communication always seems impossible, WHY? because their brains are wired differently, and they fail to see this. Let me quote you an example from survivor :

Guy - Ian
Girl - forgot who
Guy promises to bring girl out for the reward(a dinner) if he wins it. Guy won the challenge, but took another guy with him instead.

After the dinner, the girl confronts the guy. Girls upset, guy feel its absurd.

Now before i tell you the verdict let me make a prediction, for those reading this, guys must be thinking:

Well its no big deal really, its just dinner, live with it! The guy can buy you dinner some other time

The girls must be thinking:

Man, this guy is ridiculous, he just broke a promise! He should've kept his promise !

surprised at how i know what you are thinking? (if u're an average guy/girl), well i am no fortune teller, its just i know how your brains are wired.

Notice, to guys, its just DINNER, but to girls it was a PROMISE. This brings us to the sensitivity problem , girls want LOVE guys want THINGS.

A reserach showed that boys at the age of two can locate lost toys easily while girls struggle. But girls can recongize the faces of people while guys fumble. Reason? simple, guys love THINGS, girls love PEOPLE.
Well for more information, please read up on the book "why men dont listen, and women cant read maps" . its an engligtening journey, this book has really helped me (and surprinsingly true) uncover the mystery of why men and women simply cant communicate, its really a prehistoric problem.

Hopefully now you know what the opposite sex is thinking! thks!!!

two days in a row..quiz

2005-08-18T21:24:00.000-07:00

Wednesday, August 18 , Cloudy

Today was the best wednesday i have had in terms of time table, all i had on the menu in Sp was, an hour of Corrosion Science, and 1 hour of material science (perhaps a little less). After that off i go, initially i decided to visit queensway to purchase a present for my father's birthday, but settled for jurong east's popular bookstore as i thought a book was more and most appropriate for my dad who enjoys reading(and i noticed he hasnt have a good read for months). It didnt took me too long to buy the book as i knew my dad respected LKY (god if you dont know whos LKY dont tell others you're from singapore!) so i bought him a book on how LKY managed to keep up with his chinese in the years of dominance.

After that, i was so tired that the moment i reached home i wanted to drop unto my bed only to be dragged out of it by the responsibility to change my fishes water, although not physically taxing, the mental stress could not be ignored as it far surpass what i would rather handle physically. After the tideous job , i went ahead and zzZZzzZZzzzZZZzz.......

I woke up an hour later only to find it raining, as bad a news as it may seem for me ( as i was going to play basketball) it didnt stop me from going out (since it has stopped raining), i went ahead to block 308 only to find that god has blessed me(i am not christian), an INDOOR court! , well not exactly, but because of the rituals to be performed (i trust) during the seventh month, there was a "tent" set up around the court, so it was basically, an indoor court. What better place to train then an outdoor-indoor court! So i went ahead and shoot some hoops and played some pickup games with my buddies there , only to find myself hitting fans (they hung fans up) , screening with poles(which supported the structure) and bouncing the bball off the stack of tables(which they placed there) and claiming "no out of bounds" !!(means it doesnt count as an "out" ball) The games here were pretty relaxing , but the real challenge soon presented itself when i met up with my mate, Gideon.

basketball + new blog skin

2005-08-11T12:16:00.000-07:00

It has been a long time since i last blogged. But i dont worry people, this blog is up and running again. Many things has happened in my life since i last blogged.

One of them which had a significant impact on my life would be that i have rejoined competitive basketball , and am now preparing for the mens open + CSC competition training for the 06-07 season. My plan is to play the 06-07 season, finish my NS and represent NTU when i come out.

Notice that my blog skin has changed and i have returned to the game of basketball.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wed , August 10th 2005 , Sunny

Today has been the first day of singapore's quest to 41 , and it etched a mark in my life as well. Today is the first day that i shall embark on my journey toward the 06-07 season next year.

It began with school (not exactly the best beginning but oh well) , Corrosion Science lecture , where our favourite lecturer , Mr Ho Thiam Aik (HTA) , bogged us down with a very completed graph of galvanic coupling mix potential graph. Followed by practical by Mr Kwok Chen Ko, since it was the last practical, we had alot of fun chatting along , in the midst of it, somehow mr kwok literally got placed in the fume hood for fuming ehtanoic acid(vinegar!) haha

Now comes the prime of today's event, when i returned home, i noticed that my dad was sick, but that didnt deterred me from training basketball. Also i know he wouldnt want me to stay at home just because hes sick:)

So at 1pm, i went to court 303 and began my training of 3 pointers, i started shooting and working on my shot until my friend Zhang Qi (late for 40 minutes!) arrived , then we had a little one-on-one game where i nailed 5 three pointers in a row to finish him off with the score at 7-2 :) Then we continued to have more one-on-one games where we each won and lost respectively. Gideon came along in converse set jersey and we had a little "league" of one-on-oneS . It was boring but my will to go to blk 308 to play was for naught due to the insistance of my friends.

Eventually we managed to play a little game of 3-3 (when some ppl came) and that was the most we could go. I decided to go home for a short little rest before my basketball training at night! But it was not to be, chun hoe and swee guan called me out for bball at 303 - again. Playing with them was all time fun and laughter.

Finally after the game, i went to my training place to train, took me 1/2 an hour to reach that place.. thanks to the mrt ! Anyway, most people was there already , but still the attendance fell short to have a full court game by 1 . So keith(captain of the team) and i began to train three pointers , we both took 20 shots at one go and see who could hit the most, keith (being captain!), beat me once with 11 - 20 shooting to my 8-20 :( but i won him once with 8-20 to 7-20 shooting! yey!

Then after that we had a little bit of 2 on 2 and 3 on 3 , i elbowed kenny in the face by accident during one possession and felt so guilty after that, but anyway, he heated up and started scoring like a mad machine. Then the last 3 on 3 was memorable, we won the opposition 24-0 , for the first match and won 24-21 for the second match! What a game, and i hit the game winning shot:P

Today was a eventful and tiring day for me, i took the mrt home and then realised i havent finish my case studies, 2 tutorials(which is completed by now already), and i have MATSC test to study for friday. Thats alot it seems, but i think i did the right thing by going for hardcore basketball training today, if i was given a choice, i would choose this path again.

keep blogging:)

cheers

New Theory To Life

2005-06-29T20:23:00.000-07:00

Preception --> Impression --> Action --> Consequences.

These few days i have been contemplating , "whats right and whats wrong?" , I realised that no matter what a situation may be, its never really "right" or "wrong". It really depends on how you look at it. -- Now i think everyone has heard of this before. But i have finally came up with a "theory" why people act in certain ways.

Hence the title (preception to impression which leads to action and the consequences shows)

Now this may sound very complicated but its really not that difficult to understand.

An example i would give from my own personal experience would be with my coach.

No one ever dares to say that he is ever in the wrong, not even the boldest would dare to do so (much less to say his players). Why? Because we always had the preception that hes right, (he instilled this in us), from his every action, he made us think that hes always right, and hes always coming up with "good" reasons for his doings. Now thats a preception .

And with this preception, we go on to analyse whatever he does , and it forms an impression.

--> as much as preception may sound similiar to impression, its not. A perception is what we think hes like base on our own feelings, but an imperssion is an feeling we have base on the analysis of a persons action.

So we go on to think that hes always right because of the preception that we have and so gradually our impression of him has reached a stage where we thought he was close to perfection.

So we began our actions, no matter what negative things we hear about him, we'll always make it into something positive because of the impression we have about him.

And then this gradually lead to a consequences, that we shall live to bear.

Examining closing to my "theory" , i noticed that every situation can be analyse in this format.

Dont believe me? Try it out.

Lesson of life

2005-06-01T13:37:00.000-07:00

Lesson Of Life

Today i have made a very painful decision, a practical, matured and harsh one. I have decided to quit competitive basketball for good. It may bring me much pain but nevertheless this decision is a rewarding one. I have matured out of this stage which many take years to figure it out - some never. An analogy i would give are kids playing with toys, we were all kids, and we all loved toys, but once we reached a certain level of maturity, we throw our toys aside. Does that mean that the kids are wrong? No, its just their nature. Similiarly, its in human nature to love something - especially a sport. But once you get out of that stage, you realise that competitive sports , unless used as a form of livelihood, are more harmful than beneficial - especially when blown out of proportion. I have made this decision by looking at my future, what would i gain from playing competitively? I have figured it would give me a good experience in life and prove myself to everyone i am one of the best. But would this cushion my life? Can this pay my bills? Can this provide for myself? After alot of struggle i have made this choice. Basketball is still a major part of my life, i still love it and i will still play it and i will still work hard at my game, but only for health purposes and to get JOY from the game. Thats the real original goal of the game -JOY . Competitive basketball to me brings no joy, it brings me sorrow , pain and frustration.

Now i finally have time to get my 3.5 GPA and to attend a wonderful university completely my masters degree and start providing a life i always wanted.

To those who are still stuck in that zone, i will not urge you to give up what you love, but remember my analogy, kids play with toys, they are not wrong, but it is definitely not beneficial for them if it is blown out of proportion - making it competitive.

school and anything

2005-05-30T20:50:00.000-07:00

After a long sleep, this blog is finally up and running again. Expect changes soon to this template as i find it too.. green.

School Re-opening

Well, the school didnt exactly re-open since it didnt "close" but its just a common term for us to closely relate with. First day of school was really not worth that much of a hype as i expected, the ideal way of starting school would be to meet alot of new friends whom dont know each other, and meet teachers who were fun loving . The latter was capitalised but not the former, the class seems segmented into groups from ex-classes, like berlin been divided into north south east west . It was "brutal" . The only person i spoke to was those i knew, those i didnt know, i only know ONE of their name, a guy name chin hong. No dont think i am gay, his name caught my attention as it is pronounced the same way as my team-mate name called "qing hong" . You couldnt miss a guy like this when everyone calls his name and you thought your sec 5 friend just made a jump across a bridge to poly when his O levels are dued this november now can you? Nevertheless, although not exciting, today has been rewarding. Meeting up with old friends and re-visiting the long-forgotten lives as a polytechnic student has once again motivated me to work harder for a better future. The teacher's speeches was very enlightening as they brought the puzzle pieces together and showed us the big picture - our future. Throughout primary one till poly one, all i ever thought of was "Studying are for my parents, my teachers....." - everyone but myself. But today, i finally understood it with my HEART that, studying is for ourselves. I realised this long ago with my brain, i have thought of it, i have heard it numerous times and i have contemplated it, but today, it went in to my HEART. I truly understand the competitiveness among people in society, and begin to feel alot more vulnerable. However, this sense of being vulnerable seems to awaken my instincts within and seems to empower me with will power and confidence i have never felt so strongly before.

I hope this strength will grant me a good materialistic life so that i can pursue the spiritual path when the time ripes.

The word "anything"

As a person who likes to read and one who loves psychology, its really no coincidence i would have read books on psychology and how the human brain works. Through these books, i have learned what to say and what not to , and what are the implications it can bring about. And from my own experience, the word "anything" is a killer. How many times have i heard it? - countless. It may sound simple, its just a word! for christ sake! - thats what i always hear . But its really more than words. If you say this to a guy -normal- friend, i think he wont give it much of a thought. But do not say this to anyone else you care for, especially to females. Females interperet what they hear but the meaning not by the word. For example, in survivor, everyone would remember ian promising katie(i think so) to a dinner if he wont the reward challenge(which would allow the winner to bring someone with him/her). But ian brought another friend instead.

Katie upset because ian broke his promise.

To ian hes thinking " Man, you're upset over steak and beer? its just dinner!, get over it!"

To katie however shes thinking "You broke your promise, this shows how much you care about me(pun intended), i dont mean a thing to you, i cant even compare with your friend"

Both sides aint wrong, but my point is - be tactful.

The word "anything" can mean alot of things. But most people take it as a casual remark which does not show appreciation for effort. My own personally dread this word. I remember once,(not long ago), i organised a meeting with a friend, just to meet him, i had to spend an additional $1.45 because of the travelling and i had to tell my mom i was gonna leave the house earlier. All this just to show the sign of brotherhood and friendship. And when i asked him "shall we meet tomorrow at _ am?" he'll reply "anything" . This no doubt is not a negative answer, it sure is a very casual answer. behind the word its implying "okay whatever, you wanna meet so be it. Its you wanna meet me, i am doing you a favour, by obliging" . It just pricks my very very inner heart, although it doesnt feel bad, but i felt bad. In my shoes, its like, i spend so much time to do this and your answer is "anything?". how would you like me saying that to you? Try organising a class outing for your WHOLE class and when you ask them they say "anything". Its a sign of disregard, its a sign of un-sincerity. Although its only a word. A better reply would be "Sure no problem" this sounds better! The better answer would be "Thanks man, i'll see you there at __ time" or if you must say no put it like this "I really appreciate it but i cant make it" . All these answers beats "anything" .

Just a note of caution and a bit of whining about the word "anything"

australia

2005-04-21T06:44:00.000-07:00

Alright i am finally back from Melbourne Australia and i have more than a few things to say about
my trip. Firstly i would re-collect my memories on a day-to-day basis , at every chapter, i will add in my own thoughts and feelings. This will be a long post i assure you, but i also guarantee you some reading pleasures for those who have the patience to sit down for half an hour to gaze at a book which sinks you into an abyss of the world constructed by the author. Of course, that does not include magazines and stuff - books only.

Chapter 1: The Flight To Melbourne

As much as i would like a rest after a busy day of trying to remember complicated formulas, sophisticated structures and a "Everest" full of facts, it was not to be. My agenda was to get back home, pack my stuff up in a little box which will serve as a useful companion second to any dog for the next half a dozen days. I was generally in a rush, so my mind was going "Zoom, Boom Bang Ban" , seems to rhyme, i wish the time would rhyme with my rythm but instead it was running out of tune and out of time. We rushed to the airport - okay i'll skip the details here , and to our utter surprise, and unpleasantly as well, my step-dad forgot to bring along his wallet and his driving license. (Yes yes i know , driving license? i am getting to the point) No wallets means no credit cards(we still have cash) but no driving license means no holidays(we were supposed to drive around eastern Australia) , c'mon i mean, we cant spend 1 week shopping at the airport of Melbourne? Or spend a quarter of our budget trying to get around eastern Australia. The solution would be to return to our house and get them both. Solved. The next thing we know would be we're the last ones on board and then we're in the sky staring down at Singapore and then clouds that seems to stretch to the ends of the earth.

Chapter 2: On Board

The flight was scheduled from 9pm local time to 4am local time, thats approximately seven hours, and it also coincides with the times my eyes are shut and dreams flow into my temple. But today was a little out of routine, my eyes was open and the only thing in my temple was fear staring through the screens of the movie "Meet The Fockers" . I couldnt sleep, it was not that i was not tired, but i have a typical phobia for planes, i dont trust anything that doesnt have it feets on the ground - like a plane . So i sat upright throughout the journey with my mom prompting me to sleep and me shaking my head. Just imagine a clock that goes "koo-koo" , my mom's hand is going to and fro asking me to sleep and my head is shaking left to right saying no.

Chapter 3: Journey to Apollo Bay

We arrived at 6.30 am Australia time , we're 2 1/2 hours away from the opening of "Hertz" company, where we'll collect our rented cars and begin our journey to Warrnambool - expedition begins. First thing i did when i hit the airport? Sleep. I just sat on the seats and slept, oh yes i had dreams. Then i woke up at half past eight, visited the souvenirs stores and went for breakfast. The thing about cafes in Australia, they COST. Imagine this, a layer of bread less than 3 inches in length that goes in this order , bread lettuce bacon lettuce bread, costs AUS 7.80!!!? Thats like SGD 9 , right here in singapore, i can buy 9 sets of the same bread! So we settled to eating "Hungry Jacks" , Australians way of calling "Burger King" . Well they were cheaper , approximately SGD 8 per meal . i never ate a fast-food meal so expensive in my life where my memories serves me well. Oh and yeah, everything there costs. At 9 am (AUS), we went out of the airport and back, wondering why? It was so cold you couldnt step out without 3 layers of clothing - well at least for me. I wore a collared shirt , followed by a long sleeve shirt (that is made of thick cotton) finally followed by a jacket which apparently is to keep me warm. I wore two gloves , jeans and thick thick socks. Okay that made me felt better, doesnt erase the fact that it felt cold. We collected our car and headed out towards our destination, Apollo bay.

Chapter 4: The Great Ocean Road

Okay i slept for half the journey , and when i awoke, i was greeted with waves generated along the Great Ocean Road, which was supposed to be a tourist attraction and there is a legend that says that there was 9999 bends along this road. Okay i am no maniac going to count every bend we make, but i am saying this for the Great Ocean Road, it bends more than a snake gliding through the sands. It has more trees than the whole of singapore combined , and it takes twice the time to travel it than it is to travel horizontally from one end of singapore to the other. And the temperature? Needless to say - cold. Took a few videos of the magnificent scenery and then we arrived at Apollo Bay.

Chapter 5: Apollo Bay

This place, is practically a farm. You find me a building 3 storeys or higher and i'll find you psychologist. I cant account for the number of farms here in Apollo bay with my toes. So we stopped over at our hotel(okay we took 15 minutes circling around it before finally getting to it). We were all hungry, and we were desperate for something "uniquely singaporean", no this is no Report Writing And Presentations Projects(RWP) - this is reality. So we searched the street(normally when we dont put an "s" at the end of a word, its singular) for a restaurant that contained something "Chinese" (we realised that finding something singaporean is too much to ask). We found rice at the end of our search(did i mention theres more than 10 streets?)
, we were delighted, we sat down, and ordered our food(with great difficulty because of the fact they didnt really catch our "singlish), and the menu looked like this, honey baked chicken, 2 plates of rice and one lagsane. And the price didnt look like this: SGD 30 - something i would consider reasonable, it looked like this, 69 aus = SGD 80. And the rice taste like it has been soaked in grass meant to be fed to cows and was totally inedible by humans(excluding cannibals) , but the magic to this was "soysauce". After our meal, we decided to stick to traditional "kopitiam" style meals - bread and butter, includes dinner breakfast lunch supper.
Once back at the hotel, i slept, and basically was infected by the "pig" virus - slept ate slept .

Chapter 6: Journey to Warrnambool

Okay warrnambool was the main event of this trip, because my mom’s officially graduating(or has unofficially) from deakin university as a Bachelor Of Commerce . The trip to warrnambool(pronounced Wor-ran-bool), was uneventful so I’ll skip it here. But at warrnambool , I would say it was genuinely the highlight of the trip and truly meaningful things happened.

… to be continued

comments please!

RWP downloads (NA to others)

2005-03-22T20:12:00.000-08:00

http://s6.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=3KKKZ0VZZJZJH270QOZM1QMT00

http://s6.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=14F9C498PSHO83S70PT0YW243A

Thoughts

2005-03-09T20:28:00.000-08:00

Everytime i wanted to type something into my newest blog entry, my mind will start drifting off to another dimension, does this mean that i am already bored in blogging? definitely not to me, bcause i think i have too many thoughts that i find it hard to capitalise it into words.

A few things to start off with are students not understanding the importance of their education, many a times, its very tempting to fall asleep during lessons and just to 'switch off' during one drought of drowsiness spread by the lecturer, but i think its of utmost importance that you try to listen and at least do some self-study if the teacher totally just CMI(cannot mak it), beats spending your time procrastinating, and the consequence of this is, you know nothing about the syllybuas and you ask stupid questions just 3 hours before your exam. Is that being considerate? bugging someone for answers(simple basic fundamental ones) when he/she is trying to do his/her final preparations for his/her test? You be the judge.

The same goes for projects and report, today was RWP, and i was so shocked to hear that we only had a week to go to hand in the RWP report, and guess what my classmates told me?:) Dont worry, we'll scrape by, its next week! and we havent even drew out the contents page! But heck, relax, its NEXT week. Sensing some procrastination here? ALOT!

Part from that, lifes been peaceful, damn peaceful, cant ask fer more from the part of myself and people around me. Small problems and minor setbacks do occur. I am satisfied with life as it is now. I learned something, dont ask for anything good unless you're prepared for something bad. I truly feel for this during the course of my life, dont ASK for anything good, dont request for this and demand for that, unless you're prepared for something bad. Many a times, i see the people around me, they're forever complaining how bad life is... ah how i wish i had that, how i wish he/she treats me better, how i wish i had less homework... asking for everything, but NOT WORKING TOWARDS IT! Its like saying "i'll only start saving money when i have a million dollars", instead of "I'll start saving now for a million dollars", see the irony? Least i do. As the saying goes "Count Your Blessings", many people fail to do that. When you score 99/100, you focus on how you didnt get that 1 mark instead of how good it is to get the 99 marks, how pessemistic can people get? When you get a headache, you complain my headaches, instead of "My eyes aint blind, my chest feels relax, my muscles aint cramped up". See how we take things for granted? Every so often!

I think thats like 1% of the thoughts that has been running through my mind these few days, hopefully you guys will learn something from my experience:)

New year

2005-02-15T20:05:00.000-08:00

So many days has passed since i last entered a blog entry, busy these days with life , and not necessarily the most enjoyable of things to do. New year arrived quickly as quickly as it extinguished itself, the deepest impression it left this year was feasts and never forgetting the alluring red packets and house hold chores that seemed to be uncompleteable.

Feasts
Feasts has always been enjoyable for one and all and i particularly love them during new year time , but this year, things may slighty differ from the previous as it came almost 'too fast too furious'. As enjoyable as they seem, having them five days in a row can take a toll on you - both mentally and physically. Wednesday was the 'first day' of new year and i had two feasts with my mom's side relatives and my dad's side relatives. Thursday was a simple one with ex-secondary school mates and swiftly came friday in which i spent the night having a scrumptious steamboat with my own family members. Although all may seem to be over, saturday was my cousin's birthday and that only meant one thing -yet another feasts. Sunday was more exciting, travelling from one place to another, breakfast was plain and simple white bread, but lunch was pot-luck feasts with my mom's side relative(again) and dinner was at another cousin's place(best so far). All these came in a row and left me a lasting impression of feasts and maybe, a phobia towards it. The feasts also came at a price, no basketball training for the week, that was a terrible thing for me.

The events that follows before and after the feasts were either too insignificant to mention or simply washed away from my mind filled with images of people wishing me happy new year. One however, etched deeply within my bain. The matter of friendship and life. New year may be a joyous occasion but the saying goes that only in light do people recongize darkness. In the happiness of these joyous events, it has also showed me a clear image of how time passes and how people change and eventually 'have to go'. Pessemistic as this may sound, it is a truth that has been on the 'denial' or 'ignore' of many , but a truth never to be changed. This also brought about myself questioning how strong friendships can be in time of adversity and put to the test every so often that it always seems to hit the weakest link. Mentioned this so often that i am worn out to repeat this all over again, but i only hope things would start getting better on both these matters.

Wishing everyone a happy new year(although i trust you have heard it countless times) and good health. Money shouldnt be giving that much of a priority as it is given now, as health ,happiness and kinship easily outweighs what a few pieces of multiple coloured notes can do.

talk training open house

2005-02-03T16:21:00.000-08:00

System detects unknown new data...

Establishing back up system to encode text...

Code employed...

098...
0983...
09835...
098357...

code distortion correction ...

9u3...
9u3ss2...
9u3ss2te5...

Code distortion done...

Displaying text in "E.N.G.L.I.S.H" code...

3...
36...
364...
3645...
36464...
364647...
3646474...

Option talk 2/2/05

Today was the offical day for the DCP option talk, where we were 'enlightened' by a talk which is full of propaganda by three lectureres regarding the 3 fundamental options(maybe you can it traditional), Industrial Chemistry, Polymer and Food option. As it already is, the talk was literally boring all of us to death, i would be surprised to find one or two special exceptional students who were very enthuastic about every single letter spoken out of the smartly dressed lecturers. To add to our misery(or pleasure to those enthuastic students), the section head gave another talk on the CIE option where it can be taken with any of the three options. Nevertheless, it was an informative talk that should help us to make our decision as to which optino to enter during our second year of study in Diploma in Chemical Process Technology(DCP).

Training

After the talk, i met up with Pei Kun(he happened to undergo the same misery as i did during the talk), he was complaining how he is a dog for squatting through the whole talk(at that instant i felt so lucky i had a seat). Went to have dinner, which turned out to be not so healthy chicken rice, i gobbled it down as if i havent eaten for weeks, but pei kun wasnt able to finish his food, maybe he ate too much tidbits before meals. Journey to 108(training court) was pretty eventless ,unexciting and nothing worth a mention. So training went on as usual, finally the grand finale was 5-5. I did get to play a good portion of it(which i usually dont), but i did very very badly. Maybe because i havent been able to play for long enough during the past month. But i promise to work on my mistakes and to be the best player that can be brought out of me.

SP OPEN HOUSE 3/2/05

Met Jun Rong today for the open house, well, to be frank, i didnt went to see any of the things there simply because i am already a student of singapore polytechnic. Makes you feel proud that yuo have mastered the map of singapore polytechnic when your newbies friends(no offenses) is so impressed with having to walk 5-15 mintues just to reach from one destination to another(when you can tour their old school 2 rounds or so in the same period of time). Went to have lunch at food court 4 and later went up to the library to meet up with pei kun, ben and kian chuan, saw them play Counter Strike before heading to the biology practical and finally here to enter this entry:)

System switched to normal mode...

Small gestures of friendship

2005-01-31T20:31:00.000-08:00

Code verified as 'unique' ....

Searching datbase to decode...

02....
029...
0294...
02941...
029418...
0294180...
02941803...

Code establised...

Preparing to display in code pattern 'E.N.G.L.I.S.H'..

0100...
01000...
010000...

Data display......

These few days has passed swiftly like sandstorms in the dessert, strong as each wave may bring, it cannot handle the test of time. I feel life can sometimes be so unpredictable, one minute you may be healthy and alive..and the next, you're lying in a wooden case. These thoughts has passed me several times. At times when i look at my life, my family and my friends, it just shivers me the thought of them passing on. This may not be a blissful thought prior to new year, but whenever i pass a wake, i cant help but feel bitter inside of me.

Back to the happenings that has passed these couple of days, it is really nothing worth mentioning except a few moments where i felt 'touched' by gestures of others.

the first one being that a classmate(girl) of mine actually sat right next to me during my GEMS and talked me to alot, next would be my mom actually cooked green bean soup for me during the nighttime , something hasnt happened for a long time. Then pk asking me out for bball during saturday evening(which i infortunately didnt make it), after which is pk again on sunday filling me on saturday events even though i didnt asked, then was gideon whom also automatically asked me out for breakfast,then came pk who was willing to lend me his labcoat despite not having a practical on that day(tho he forgot, but hey its the thought that counts) and its shi ping who didnt wanted to back out of his promise and came to play bball with me even though his knee was hurting and he would rather rest.

now these events may seem the slightest/ least of concern for many, and would say 'its normal' 'its nothing', but i only realised how much these little things meant to me after i have lost them. These small little signs of friendship means alot to me. So thank you all guys. Hopefully my life is getting better(which unfortunately its not).

Data display completed...

system switched to normal mode...

sad day

2005-01-31T04:39:00.000-08:00

Content loaded....

Preparing to encode text....

text encoded....

Displaying data....

These few days, alot of things have happened. One as a blow complementary to the other. Reminds me of nuclear chain reactions, rapid,powerful,devastating and one stronger than the other. Maybe its me.. but...again..it could not be..

I feel the world around me crumbling ,tumbling and collasping. All the luxury i once seemed to once enjoyed has now became one so hard earned. All my friends seems to take on the same cold attitude in unison. Even those who were supposed to be closest to me are starting to drift. I realise, i am alone in this blackhole. 5 of my best friends dont even seem to know me all that well anymore, the pressure mounting on my shoulders could be on par with that of those weighing upon the foundation of mount everest. In this situation, i feel extrememly sensitive even to a word down right to the letters within it. I would think ten thoughts into a joke. Now i understand the saying , trying to be a good person is hard, its easier to be bad.
Take today for an illustrated classic textbook example. A friend of mine, names dont matter for one stands fer all and all stands fer one - black sheeps in a herd . I had asked him out for basketball the day before and was looking forward to it. Knowing i had a practical in the afternoon - which may delay the time of meeting this friend, i practically skipped every break given by the teacher , short ones which can last about 10 seconds, to long ones which can last to 15 minutes, just to do the practical worksheet(it was a knowledge base worksheet). I survived on bread for lunch and rushed to the library to complete the worksheet - even then i still had a few more questions to do. And i continued this strainous routine until i finally finished it before the practical. After the practical(obviously i was the first to go), i rushed a bus down to meet my friend where he was(not the court), my intention was to go there, meet up with him and finish his business before going to the court for a basketball game. But, when i arrive there, to my utmost dismayal, he wasnt carrying shoes, he wasnt in attire for basketball , he was in slippers and slacks. I kindly asked him if he was going to play still? And he said NO. Is that supposed to be how you keep a promise? The least he could've done was to send me a simple SMS to inform me about his decision. Why should i work so hard for the practical worksheet? When the teachers was literally giving us answers on the board. Why should i rush my lunch? why do i have to bear with stupid crowd in the bus when i can cruise back home on a comfy chair in the MRT? Why did i have to sprint 500 m to the place once i get down the bus? And start sweating like a water tap malfunctioning, only to find out it was all in vain. Although i have broken a promise to this friend before, the least i did was inform him about my decision, and he still got mad, and now this. I just dont understand. And the reason he gave was hes tired, accepted. I dont mind, i mean, okay you're tired, fine, inform me and you're cool. BUT, the worst hing is, he actually said "Okay i am going to look for my friend.", thats a sign of being tired?

I am really tired of always being the good guy and being mistaken for everything. If i do something extra for my friend, and he'll say i am gay. If i didnt do anything, they'll say i am not friendly enough. I think i am done being a good guy, forever going out of the way to aid people and being mistaken. i had enough, maybe i would be a happier guy being the bad person...

Data Transmission completed....

Code Reconigzed and saving....

Systems switch to normal mode....

Colour testing....

2005-01-23T20:59:00.000-08:00

Colour Test
Colour Test
Colour Test
Colour Test
Colour Test
Colour Test
Colour Test

stress

2005-01-23T13:02:00.000-08:00

Did a bit of colour testing above... Hopefully its right , i meant he colours.. decided to use white.

Going through a difficult period right now.. STRESSED up.. by school studies friends family... everything...its like the whole world collasping on you...i guess i'll just need time to sort this out..so everyone..bear with me and my blog ! Appreciate more chatter in the box!

2005-01-18T07:37:00.000-08:00

Dreams............

Today was a very tiring day for me, slept barely 5 hours the night before and after school, I went to play basketball for another 4 hours.Upon reaching home, i began to study a little of maths(a little...), and went to bed, at around 9.30pm? I was soooo tired.....i felt my body yelling for rest!

First Dream: Tsunami?

I dreamt i was a fisherman, fishing at the port , i would walk to and fro the coffee shop at the top of the hill(the port was located at a lower level compared to the coffee shop as the place was a hill), and i kept doing this, its odd but, the moment i caught a fish, i would go to the coffee shop and hand it to a uncle. Soon however it began to rain, so i stopped fishing and went to the coffee shop to rest and get ready to return home. After hours of wait,the rain didnt seem to stop, and we already noticed a signifiacant rise in water level....until....it began to flood the coffee shop, in a panic i grabbed a life-jacket nearest to me....and.....i woke up:P The first thing that i made of this dream was TSUNAMI! But later upon further thought, it could be a flood.

Second Dream: Watching Basketball

Basically this dream is a continuation of the first,but way out. I went home and went out with my team to watch a friendly match between chong yee and ??? . Chong yee was filled with TALL people and the opponent filled with SHORT people....I rememebered the Chong yee people slaughtered the ??? team by alot of points and i was telling shi ping(in my dream) that if we ever met up with this team we would lose like mad.....Then i woke up again......

Third Dream: Selections
Another continuation of the second dream, after watching the match, we went back to our home court for a selection of players for a friendly competition thats going to take place a few days later. So i dreamt of me training at leng kee CC running up and down , i forgot the details, but i got selected anyway...then i woke up again...

Final dream: Competition
The last dream i had was also a continuation of the third....Dreaming of the day of the competition, we were early at court 108 , we were shooting around , the only difference about the court was the landscape was a bit different from reality, but anyway , we saw the opposing team come in, they were all TALL people...and to my shocking surprise i saw the words "Chong Yee" behind, i was telling shi ping(or was it gideon???)that we are in for a hard match....because we just saw(in dream two) how they slaughtered the other team......Then the competition started....it was ODD, our three younger coaches(De wei, ah Mao and guan yong) was playing too! And worst of all....we were playing using 2 kg medicine ball -_-""", i rememebered that guan yong kept asking me to shoot, i shot then i made a 3 pt...then he ask me to shoot again...and this time i got blocked:( then i shot again.....then it air ball..... i was complaining that the ball was way heavy....then i woke up......

What surprised me throughout this stretch isnt the dreams , they were normal . But what shocked me was the continuation of it! All the dreams were linked, and in between these dreams, i actually woke up!!! One of them which was a toilet trip...And 4 in a row too....thought wanted to share with everyone to see what kind of opinions you guys have.....i personally....its the first time:P

triple tired day

2005-01-13T13:01:00.000-08:00

Today was a very very extremely tiring day for me. Not that it was planned, everything happened unexpectedly and more out of desire than a logical sense.

Today woke up pretty earlier , because i had this resolution not to be late for school ever again. School starts at 8 today, so i got up by 0635 , prepared myself, finished chanting(sutras), then after that i went off to school. Arrived at dover, hoping to see a guy with earphones,cap,red shirt, blue jeans and golden hair:P Guess whos that? Who else but pei kun? He always poses for dover MRT station, a classic example for those who comes too early and waits for classmates:P(second to me that is) Anyway thats just something to loosen the tension a bit.

School really went on as usual, except that excel lesson was kinda fun today, learned a bit of stuff that is starting to feel interesting(at last).

The true fatigue comes after school, see, the original plan was this, go home, sleep, wake up, play PS2, then go training. I thought i was strong enough mentally to carry out this 'simple' schedule. But fate was not to be.

On the MRT train, i met up with two of my friends , and they asked me to play basketball at 108(training court). Well, since i wasnt really in the mood for sleep , my thought was "Okay i'll play for a bit then go home". So off we went to 108, only to find nobody there (visible to the naked eyes that is), so we ended up playing 1-1 , 2-1, and that felt really BORING, especially under HOT SUN. So we really finished up the game fast, and i got treated to a drink because we made a bet , that if i won the 2-1 game, they would treat me to a drink and vice versa. So after that, i embarked on the way home...

On the way home, i came across my other friend(playing basketball in yuhua's court), and once again, the outcome was obvious, i went to play AGAIN:P . This time the matchup was fairly relaxing, mainly because they were quite new to the game. So we had a casual 3-3, and i think because of my 'dont sweat' motion, somehow there got pissed at me(i think) and he was playing me aggressively, well, i didnt liked that at all. So i broke his ankles a few times and continued the game until........UNCLE came along(good player at the age of 40+), i was kinda looking forward to this match-up between me and him, but..... i didnt want to tired myself out, because had training at night. But he was SOOOO good, maybe he was feeling it, he knocked shot after shot, so i tried my best to guard him, and vice versa. Ended up losing 21-11( :( ), then we had another game, this time i was with UNCLE, but we still lost(he lost his touch:P).

This two activity totally tired me out, so the moment i got home, i dropped on my bed, asleep. Woke up and ate, then went for training.

Training

Oh training was sick, i was feeling tired but still went on(actually i felt like dying already:P), initially i told myself(i should give myself a break, stay at home and sleep). But i reasoned later that, if i went to sleep and not go for training, then it would make me very irresponsible because i had made the decision to play in the afternoon,(cause of fatigue) and should accept the consequences, so the moral part of me went ahead for the training.

Today's highlight of the day was probably jumping CHAIRS, not 1 chair, not 2 chair, but 2 chair with bricks! Jun Rong,Harry , Pei Kun and I attempted this new 'stunt'. We were all able to do it fine initially, barely making the mark, but as fatigued setted in(for me it was 2x fatigue:P), we began to fall over the chair, and everything, but guan yong kept us going(which i really find it GOOD), kept telling us to carry on, to me that was a great motivational factor. So we went on and finished our sets(i only did 56 times:P but was really tired). In the course of this event, we offically, crippled two of ah seow's benches, cause earthquake around the court and provided 'entertaiment' for those watching:P

The rest of the training went pretty much as usual, drills then 5-5 .

Hopefully those who have unconsistent attendance will start stepping up and not let coach ah seow's hopes down anymore.

Slam 108

2005-01-10T22:38:00.000-08:00

A new forum has been newly created for all of 108 bballers, the address is:

http://s8.invisionfree.com/Slam108/

in the case that you do not know what to do heres the instructions:

1)Go to the top left hand corner and click on 'register'
2)Enter your particulars and remember to click on 'i agree' and submit it
3)you're now offically a member of slam108!
4) to post simply click on any category for eg "training' and a new window will open with topics created by other people, you may create a new topic by clicking on 'new topic' at the right hand corner.

6)every member from 108 will automatically be promoted to a moderator, you will then be able to close topics,open, pin topics, although i dont think its neccessary.

7)post frequently! -->ensure board flow

8)Any misconducts in the board will be seen as an act of disrespect to our coach , ah xiao, our court, 108 and the game of basketball. Punishments will be given.

Overall, enjoy the board!

Training

2005-01-10T10:24:00.000-08:00

Today was training again! But this time, i was watching from the sidelines, because, the day before, i developed a very mild fever + super splitting headache and sore throat. So i decided to rest my body for the day(otherwise i will end up like last thursday, felt like dying).

Today was the same physical stuff and then was this super tiring drill, where you pass the ball to the coach standing outside, run to the half court, spin around a dustbin and run back for a lay up, sounds easy? NOT AT ALL, because the coach will start counting , once you run he will count 'one two three four'(total of 2+ seconds), then when you run back he'll count "one two three", and the ball will be passed - whether you catch it or not. And he'll start scolding "No fast enough! No explosiveness!", but i really think we should appreciate it.

I doubt many people know but, coach xiao didnt have his breakfast at all(at 10 am!) and was passing the ball to us(10 people for 15 minutes), despite his hand problem(joint inflamnation), his joint was inflamned indeed after passing, but how many people actually realised? i doubt many.

Then training went on bla bla bla...

What is interesting is watching from the sidelines is a whole different experience, you get to see your team-mates training and you get 'enlightened' on alot of things, as to what, i wouldnt say it out here.

I am just glad ah xiao is finally willing to teach us and we're a TEAM again:)

two days in a row with much ups and downs

2005-01-07T20:50:00.000-08:00

havent update for a while but with good reasons:D (you'll see below)

okay lets begin from wednesday....till today(Fri)

Wednesday
Today was a hell of a freaking nature day for me,woke up in the morning only to realise that i am sick and down with a sore throat(inflanmation), to be precise, i was never healthy(cough still there ....yes), but this sore throat came down as a pretty sore one. I was hesitant whether i should attend school that day(considering it was such a nice weather to cuddle in your nest), but with much thought, attending school was the wise route. School went on just like this, excel module did caught my interest,everyone(including the lecturer) left,except me, i was messing with the excel trying to do alot of stuff - interesting ones of course. (Just so you know, the room wasnt locked).

Then came the afternoon, due to the sore throat,i decided to see my doctor(eu yan sen -tiong bahru) 4 days ahead of schedule, went to him, and found out that, because i had been sick for 4 months or so, my immune system wasnt strong enough, and probably breathe in some viruses that causes the infection. he prescribed me a medication that would cure the sore throat(now its fri and its obviously taking its effect, slowly but surely - better than antibiotics). Then followed by 7 days of medication for cough.

Tonight, despite my sickness, i still went for training , mainly because ah xiao our coach, has finally decided to teach us again! whole heartedly, of course i wouldnt let this oppourtunity slip by. he taught us alot and pushed our limits a bit, we had to run to the half court line, put the ball down on a pedestral, run 2m in front, touch a tennis ball, get the ball and do a leftie lay up. Then run back to the half court, put the ball down..touch tennis ball..get the ball, make a strong pass to your team mate, then sprint , catch the medicine ball(2kg , normal bball = 700+g),and do another leftie lay up. Everytime we got ONE medicine ball in through the hoop count as ONE, we had to do this 150 times, we had 10 people. Sounds easy? NO! because each person only had an approximate 30 seconds of interval between each set, and base on our misses, each person had to run 20+ rounds,now tell me thats easy again. There were drills before and after that, but i wont mention it here. After that, ah xiao taught us how to break a zone defense. Complicated stuff, but still did pretty well for beginners.

After training,shi ping , new-comers and me help to keep all the stuff, pei kun was busy distributing money(and i got my debt back!), then we went to say 'goodbye' to coach. But he ignored us, me and shi ping was like "???" , this block of ice stuck in between us and ah xiao for like 25 minutes, before he finally pointed at the water bucket(he prepared for us to drink from it), then did we realised we forgot to keep it! But we really taught it was because the other players still playing on court wanted to drink from it. A few others from the team also got the same treatment(the ice wall!:D), but just simple ignore the 'signal' and just went home. So we kept the bucket and bid ah xiao goodbye for that day,he finally(YES at last) waved us goodbye.

day ended without much turbulence.(maybe its night ended)

thursday

Today woke up, sore throat was still there(told ya Chinese medication takes a while!), but felt better, went to school. All the lessons were very-very-very stressful today, 2 hours of IO(Inorganic - Organic) chemistry, which taught us the Lewis sturcture(basically its just dots and crosses, but with complicating rules), then it was a super "information over loading" lesson on mycology(microbiology - fungi), then micro-biology practical! The practical was really interesting, but the microscopes werent too friendly with me, i have a weakness for strong lights, and i had to face the lights from the microscope for two hours! I developed an instant headache(pretty bad one too,partially due to lack of sleep too),but still beared on, clinging on to undying integrity not to cheat on the practical(well ,you basically just had to draw and measure the size of a bacteria, that , can be easily copied). Gordon, Wei Zhong and me all worked together very hard to get a first hand look at how bacteria cells looked like -mind you they were beautiful.

After that i went home,actually visiting grandma was the actual schedule,but because i couldnt find my 'parthner' (my cousin whom promised to go with me) and my grandma said it was late , so i decided to go another time. my headache was still on, but i thought it was bearable, so i went to the bball court to play bball. The matches went pretty well for me, because i was basically 'feeling it' , some taught i was left handed(thanks to ah xiao super training), but well, i am not.

After the game i basically just sat there, fatigue,headache,gastric,general discomfort and muscle ache(from yesterday's training). I sat there for 20 hell-liked minutes, it was horrible feeling, i was feeling so sick, i literally dragged my body home. Bought dinner on the way back(with a overwhelming headache), got home, pop 2 panadol 'strong', ate dinner and sat on the sofa - almost paralysed. After that i got better and the day went on....

fri:

will update on the next entry(because my mom needs the com now!)

Why they are friends

2005-01-03T22:31:00.000-08:00

Because ... they smile
Because ... the understand just by looking into your eyes
Because ... they finish your sentences and know what you like
Because ... they know you better than you know yourself
Because ... with them you arent afraid to be yourself
Because ... you can say something or expose your deepest secret
Because ... you dont need to do something special to have fun ... fun just happens
Because ... they would do anything for you and get you out of trouble
Because ... they make you laugh harder than anyone
Because ... they are not afraid to put themselves on the line for you
Because ... you can trust them
Because ... they believe in your dreams, no matter how silly they may seem
Because ... they dry your tears
Because ... you are good enough when you are with them
Because ... they love you for who you really are

adapted from 'Chicken Soup for the Teenage soul on Friendship'

This is a tribute to my best friends:
Yi Chuan
Shi Ping
Gideon
Pei Kun
Jun Rong

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

2005-01-03T20:40:00.000-08:00

Relationship + Friendship Handling

Having withness the failure of relationship and friendship, i would like provide everyone a little food for thought for everyone to digest.

In any relationship (friendship is also a form of relationship, i'll generalise it here), communication is the most important aspect. Come on, everyone has heard this before, but dont go 'Ah another of those things', i would like to provide a more practical aspect to this explaination. Everyone knows about 'communication', but do they really understand what it means?

1) Point out any problem ASAP

Whenever you face a mis-understanding, for example, you feel the other party has done something you feel is wrong, voice it out in the best possible next moment. Find an appropriate time, when only you and the other party is there, voice it out, talk it over. If you've decided to not talk about it, drop it for good. Do not and i mean DO NOT bring it over to the next day/week/month/year etc. Why? Simple, when you start bringing all these things over, you get this thought 'I am tolerating your nonsense, i am above you, because i tolerated your nonsense, you're below me, because you did something wrong which , for the sake of greater good, dont wanna say it out', realise this people, this is a very childish thought. Its full of ego and downright childish.

If you really want to do it for greater good, either voice it out or bury it for good. If the other party keep on repeating this mistake, then you'll keep voicing it out until he changes. In any relationship, its important not to have any form of ego present. Okay lets assume you tolerate until one day, you EXPLODE. And you start POURING out everything from before, the other party might go 'WHAT?', and then the other party will have her side of argument, and you will be busy trying to convince her she is WRONG, isnt this a very chidish drama? We must always look at what our ultimate objective?

The purpose of storing up all the nonsense from the other party? --> So you wont quarrel
But thats not really the case, it only mean unless you BURY it for good, its gonna store up, mutate(because as time passes, memories fade), and its gonna become big problem.

Okay, back to the exploding moment, whats your objective in pouring out everything? You're trying to convince her shes wrong! okay, she admits shes wrong, apologise, and you go 'Apology doesnt help, you've hurt me too much, you betrayed my trust and i feel really hurt', then she go 'oh i wont repeat it', and you are like 'its too late, this is too much for me', so WHAT DO YOU WANT? you really dont know, because its all masked by a huge cloud of EGO!

I am only pointing out one aspect of this friendship problem, because i am facing it right now and i think its so important to know this! Its important to communicate, dont try to act the superior one, forever allowing the other party's way, and exploding at the last moment. this is, i repeat, CHILDISH! only children do that, 'i dont wanna friend you already'.

Surely everyone has this kind of experience,especially with parents, when they scold you, they bring out how you broke the vase when you're 7 months old(when you're already 17), how you kicked her when you were 1 years old, how you broke her fish tank when you were 3 and how you pissed her off when you were 6...............and finally, now you're 17, you're still doing this! Isnt that downright IRRITATING? in short, say it or bury it.

Any comments are welcomed at the tagboard --->

thanks

Omega

2004-12-30T12:54:00.000-08:00

Long Day

Awakening from sleep today, the day ahead was expected to be full of turns and twists, because today is the day where i have to decide where to go to 108 or leng kee CC? It was not an easy decision but i'll come to that at a later part of this post.

Today's Wednesday, and that also means that lesson ends at 12pm today! Thats really great news, and i had a long list of activities in front of to really look forward to! Been a while since i felt so happy. So after school , shi ping came to my house to play PS2, after in which gideon joined us, we played for hours before finally decided its time to go to tiong bahru plaza - where i visit my TCM doctor. So after much delay,we went to 108 to visit ah seow first, we asked him
if we can train at 108 and leng kee together, to our dismayal, the answer was negative(thinking back its a good thing), after that, we went to tiong bahru plaza. During the ride, i shared a few tips on how to stay healthy in this not so healthy enviroment, we talked alot and before we knew it we were at tiong bahru MRT station. Went up to the Fifth Storey to visit the eu yan sen clinic which was very quiet - as usual. The doctor called me in and i told him about my situation that my cough has improved alot and he gave me a new set of medicine to fully cure my sickness. Till now, i am already beginning to see the effects of his medication. After thanking and bidding farwell to my beloved doctor, i went to my relative house to burn incense for my deceased uncle and we headed to where all the twists starts, LENG KEE CC.

When we arrived at leng kee CC we were among the first of the leng kee bballers to arrive there, so we went ahead to play a pick-up game of 3 on 3 with some of the people there while waiting for our coach de wei to arrive. When he came, we told him we wanted to discuss some matters with him, but he eventually did not because he played bball when he arrived and was sweating like mad, so he cant go inside a aircon room, otherwise he'll fall sick ... again. So training at leng kee CC began, we didnt train, but we just helped out by the side, after the training, we were totally convinced of our decision. No way we were going to go through that kinda training that leng kee CC provides.

Dont get me wrong now, it sounds as if it was too difficult thats why we didnt want it, in fact it was the inverse of the case. The training was totally unproductive at all, it was more of for fun, no discipline and basically useless towards our improvement.No matter how nice de wei once put his training as from before, it is very obvious that this kind of training simply CMI(Cannot Make It). So our decision was final.

We went back to 108 immdiately(to the extent that we took bread for dinner) to inform coach seow of our decision, he kept saying' i dont know, its not my business', but i guess deep down he feels really happy about this.Because he appeared to be happier after we told him our decision! But Jun Rong couldnt take it i guess, he gave us ATTITUDE, i was sitting a bit away from him, so i told him to come over as i wanted to discuss something with him, he kept saying 'wait' at least 4 times in a span of half an hour!!! And throughout that half an hour , he wasnt doing anything, just sitting there and watching a bball match! Finally i told him that i cant wait no more because we're going back soon, and he said 'ok then you all go back first'(and did i mention, he said all this in mono tone!). I can understand that he may feel hurt that we did consider going to leng kee CC after we promised him that we'll staty at 108, but really, i think we really were psycho by de wei, as he said that his coaching was better and he could bring us to greater heights(which is not the case at all). So if jun rong is seeing this, i hope to tell him, we know we judged wrongly, everyone does. But hopefully he'll have a bigger heart and forget about this.

-->This marks the end of the post(S) for the matter between leng kee and 108!

sigh...

2004-12-28T22:11:00.001-08:00

*Sigh**SIGH*

As you can see from previous posts, i really cant make up my mind on whether to remain on 108 or leng kee. for those who are very mirky on this incident, let me give you a brief background.

I was training at a block '108' hence the name around november period, when our coach(ah xiao) decided to dis-band the team, in light of this, he brought in a new coach for us named de wei , so from then, we thought ah xiao wanted us to follow de wei as a coach, so naturally when de wei asked us to go to leng kee for training, we agreed. After that, de wei got us involved involved in 'kovan payar lebar cup' , the cup went with alot of hiccups, but generally, after the cup, ah xiao was very angry with de wei, and they cease to be friends. So now our decision has to be made, should we return to ah xiao? or should we continue to stay with de wei? Below i'll present a very objective argument for both sides:

Ah xiao- Took us in when we were the weakest, trained us up
-Good responsible coach which has down-to-earth values
-Provides a mentor role when needed
-understands the psychological aspect of his bballers

De Wei-allowed us to play the payar lebar cup despite the fact we just joined not long ago
-Fairly responsible coach
-Has a 'new school' approach to basketball
-Promise us good prospects ahead.

My View:(subjective aspect)
As you can see from the arguments, the moral side of me wants to go to 108, because its a good place, with good people and a good coach. The only thing is the coaching style MIGHT, i stress MIGHT not suit me. Leng kee on the other hand fits my type and has good prospects.

BUT, de wei's also not a very responsible coach, he doesnt reward fairly at times (reward = effort formula), and his character is of doubt because of a few incidents(which i shadnt mention). Communication could also prove as a problem because of his "Silence beat all" attitude.

I have provided the arguments so i can analyse better. But from my analysis, it seems a really 50-50 case, its really like : Integrity V.S Personality kinda of a thing, i am really in a dilemma now!!!

NOTE:I AM WRITING THIS FROM A OBJECTIVE POINT OF VIEW, I AM NOT BIAS AGAINST EITHER SIDE, I AM JUST TRYING TO STATE MY STAND HERE.

sigh...

2004-12-28T22:11:00.000-08:00

http://ibbab.free.fr/Joueurs/Jordan/images/jo_nodunk_jpg.jpg

odd coincidences....painful decisions

2004-12-23T07:51:00.000-08:00

Secondary Complicationsweek ago...

.i went to see the doctor(chinese) for my cough problem, he told me i got a secondary infection which leads to a more serious complication of my cough...so he gave me a new set of medicine which is apparently working because my cough is ALMOST totally gone...around 80% recovery...talk about conincidence, as you know the previous posts i put i will be going back to 108...but due to secondary complicatons of matters i may not choose the course of action that i mentioned before. Mainly because:

1)Leng Kee CC is a place that wants me, and i need LK CC, but 108 is a place where i need but 108 doesnt need me

2)I have a great deal of respect for de wei(coach), not only as a coach, but a human, player, mentor as well

3)Future prospect, 108 doesnt promise me a very good future, leng kee does(read 4 before you comment on this)

4)108 ditched me first, when i was at the eptiome of my training, 108 decided to ditch me for no apparent acceptable reason, in that sense, it let me down, and not vice versa

5)De Wei(coach) style of teaching suits me better, as a firm believer of european basketball style of coaching, de wei is nearer to that mark as compared to 108's coaching, this is a matter of choice, not by merit
6) I am able to communicate with de wei alot better than 108 coach, i dont feel a 'block of ice' in between, when i speak, i can speak freely, knowing my opinions will be considered seriouslyMy action has not been decided yet, but many thoughts has been given to it.

Hopefully i will make a wise choice.

that is all.

NEW COURSE OF ACTION

2004-12-21T12:44:00.000-08:00

End of payar lebar cup

Today marks the end of the payar lebar(kovan)CC cup for team leng kee. We did okay for this match, but basically everyone didnt have the heart to play anymore, the team leng kee(white) has became a pile of sand that almost resembles that of a broken glass - once broken, cant be undone.

Change of course
When i first entered leng kee(not totally out of personal choice) , coach de wei gave us a very good future, from the way he put it, it was really a bright future. But the players there destroyed this future that we had. Throughout the month of my stay in the leng kee team, i didnt went through a day without thinking of the problems that has arised in the team. Thinking mind you is the most pleasant way i can possibly put it, worrying reflects the actual reality of the situation. In the light of these events, it has brought on the red light signal for all of us of the leng kee(white) to consider our futures in the team. We currently have two choices, that is to return to 108 to train with ah seow(xiao) or to remain in leng kee . My choice has been made and that will be to return to ah seow, if there are no more complications to this matter, that will be jun rong,gideon shi ping and mine decision.

I heard that pei kun and andrew has also chosen that path but i am not sure. But anyway heres a little in depth look at the team that i hope to have for our future team(learning from past mistakes)

past mistakes:

1)Team did not communicate with each other i.e misunderstandings were not cleared
2)Players were allowed to come and go as they wish

These mistakes resulted in a team that contains various deviations. The new team should look something like this:

1)One for all , all for one spirit
2)Any players that shall enter the team will be voted in or out by the members already there(case to case)
3)Weekly meetings to discuss team matters and clear mis-understandings

Reason for such decisions? So that the team will stick together as ONE, and also that this is a TEAM, not some free basketball clinic where you can come and train as you like and leave the 'clinic' as you please. To enter this team, you need to be accepted by everyone, this is to foster team spirit. What we really really LACK in the past was TEAM SPIRIT, this is the most important aspect that must be brought down to earth right from the first day. A few things the four of us has discussed would be :

--> New Team T-shirt/pants
--> Team Name
--> Team logo
--> Team Stamp
--> Team Profile

All these will be done for TEAM SPIRIT.

all in one

2004-12-16T12:37:00.000-08:00

Not updating blog

i have been very busy these days with my life, especially with the payar lebar cup and school has re-opened:( that really puts a limit on how much time i can spend online while juggling sleep, basketball, studies, television, relaxing time etc. Most importantly for me would be the number of hours i get to rest per day, i really feel tired everyday because of the hectic timetable. Because of the wise 'GEMS' module, now i have 4 days (among the 5 studying days) that ends at 5(17 00) . And whats worst? At alternate weeks i have a freaking(yes its freaking) 5 hours of break in school, and then to add to the very shocking surprise, i have another ONE hour of lesson to attend. Thats really retarded in my opinion.

Payar lebar cup
The payar lebar cup first two matches for my team was fairly a breeze as the teams we met werent really very strong(if they're strong at all), the first match was a warm up so our team didnt do very well, but the second match was a total trashing as we won them by nearly 50 points(63-17?), our target was 80 points, the referee even told us that if we can get 100 points or above he would give us three free basketball. From my experience(thanks to coach xiao), i guessed as much that the referee will not let us get the points that he had set, they'll do all sorts of funny thing that isnt really ethical at all. For example, cutting the time short (by not stopping the time during inbounding , free throws etc), holding the ball for unnecessary long periods of time, and calling fouls that are so so minor. pei kun was a little upset by the fact that we could not get 80 points but i dont think its the fault of our group(team), because in the first quarter we got 24 points and in the second quarter we only got like 11 points, we didnt even scored half of our potential. Doesnt say much for the refereees. Although i admit that our team has became complacent of the situation near the end of the match, especially no.13(the guy i let my number to ), he was so freaking complacent and arrogant. Making funny noises for no reason, taunting and taking ill-advised shots. I really regret my decision now. But rest assured i'll see something done to that guy

Our Vice-Captain
After the match, Andrew our center(AKA king of boards) had a quarrel with our vice captain , mainly because our vice captain was so full of himself, he kept on blaming his team mates about not passing to him and not doing well. okay i want to tell him this(if he sees this)

"As a point guard, you have a choice to pass to 4 different persons in 4 different scenarios, you maybe open, but its up the the guard to decide who to pass to(especially when the guard is your cpatain), if you think you can always find the open men, why dont you try playing point guard instead?"
"And in case you're thinking why we dont pass it to you, its because you dont convert of point blank drain. our opponents are at least 5 inch shorter than you are and you can miss, right under the basket???!!! you're a CENTER, and you miss those kind of shots, not once not twice not thrice, i couldnt count it with my toes. So before starting to blame others for what they cannot do, start by asking for yourself
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE FOR THE TEAM
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO EARN THEIR RESPECT

Being vice captain doesnt automatically leviate people's respect for you, the title is what you wear, the respect is what you earn. You better wake up and start to snap out of it."

So i definitely support andrew here!

Captain
Prior to the above example, i would like to praise pei kun on being a good leader. i only have one word for him , R.E.S.P.E.C.T. , thats about explains all.

But a few things he might want to note is not to get too emotional, especially as a captain, your team mates are looking up to you for leadership, if you get sad and everything, so will your team mates. So you must learn to take the lead as a leader, as a leader, you must initiate certain things.

Right enjoy folks till next time

payar lebar cup

2004-12-09T13:20:00.000-08:00

Today finally the payar lebar cup started. I split this entry into 5 parts:
Journey there
The Match
Journey back
Night
Coach Vs Bballers

Journey there
The journey there was pretty un-exciting but also quite a ride , met up with Gideon and jun rong at 3.15 pm(match at 6pm, reach by 5.30pm). There after I went ahead to get myself a pair of new slippers and two tubes of HALLS.Went to Chinese garden MRT, on the ride, we were discussing where to eat and what to eat, finally we decided to eat at kovan MRT station(heartland mall). At queenstown we saw pei kun , but , he didn’t get onboard, apparently he was waiting for jon(athan) and Andrew. So when we arrive at kovan, we went to eat - take-aways. Took a delifrance bread, whatever you call it, long name. Then got a packet of coffee, but before I can even drink my coffee, I got a stomachache, that, calls for toilet trip. The thing I didn’t know was, the toilet, was a helluva long journey, walked for approximately 10 minutes, finally toilet relief. By this time, we met pei kun(cap’ain!) ,Andrew, jon ,darius. Then went ahead to payar lebar CC.
Like I said, it was plain

The Match
Our first match-up is against a team with a strange name called SPEED. When we first saw them, we knew we were going to win. Almost all of us were a head taller than them, even our team’s shortest player had a height advantage on a few of them. This match , to us, is not a matter of winning or losing, but a matter of how much we win by. This isn’t arrogance I must remind , this is just a vast difference in finesse.(and their skill didn’t really surpass us either). We had a hard fight, partly because we were trying a few new tatics on them, full court press(a drill we’ve never done before). We won eventually, 56-43 , but it wasn’t a good win. We made too many errors in transistion and didn’t use our physical superiority to its full potential. But overall, it was a satisfying performance with a lot of room for improvement.

Then we saw the leng kee(red) team play, against tamah jurong. It was a very tough match, we were clinging on trailing by a mere few points. But eventually lost. But leng kee white(us) really got into the game, we were clapping on every made field goal and chanting ‘defence….defence…defence’ in the final quarter. It was really very fun. And that also brought us together, more united, between our team and the other as well.

Journey back
Journey back was much better. 8 person on the same train, talking trash, joking and just bonding together as a team. I really felt very happy, I see a very bright future for us if we work hard. Payar lebar cup, leng kee cup finally youth cup and eventually the men’s open. I really think we had a great sense of team spirit on the way back(mind you a long way back too kovan à jurong). We almost didn’t had a moment of boredom, the trip was subconscious, although we were cramped together in a train, we really didn’t mind, we just had our fun and talk our trash. This is really FRIENDSHIP.

Night
Short one here, talked with pei kun on msn for nearly 2 hours, about life(which we tried to avoid because it was late), basketball and everything. Another subconscious thing. We were just at it, and I think that also bonded us together more, it would be nice if our whole team was online, that would be GREAT. But such a luxury was not to be. But anyway good to have him as a friend

Coach vs Bballers
Apparently, some of our players of leng kee(white) has a little mis-understanding with the coach. I talked with the bballers, and I spoke with the coach. My conclusion is, misunderstanding. I think the coach is thinking on a different level compared to the bballer, what I can say is, we must try to communicate with the coach, when we feel something is wrong ,we should bring it up – intelligently of course, right place time etc. This will help foster coach-bballer relationship and bring the team to greater heights. Keeping disputes in our heart will not bring us anywhere but 6 feet underground. Hopefully , our team will come to understand that soon enough.

triple disaster day

2004-12-06T22:50:00.000-08:00

There is this Chinese saying that goes “disaster do not fall individually”(Huo Bu Dan Xing), I never truly tried to contemplate on these words of wisdom until something(couple of things) happened to me today

Disaster One: Grandma fell sick

My grandma fell sick today, and by the looks of it , it really appeared BAD, burning stomach, unstoppable cough and a running nose. Doesn’t sound bad enough? She hasn’t taken anything solid for the past two days(thanks to my ‘filial’ cousins). Now that is when I really learn that health is indeed a luxury. So from the morning, I had to get her from my cousin’s place , took a bus down to our house and settle some housework for her. Until then, everything seemed okay, she was fine, I was fine. Until in the afternoon she suddenly complained of abdomen pain(which is very common as excessive coughing will lead to stomach cramps). So she decided to see a doctor, I was already not very pleased because I had to go down to Leng Kee CC by 5(leaving at 4.30pm), I wanted to shoot around before our training. Okay, so I brought her to the doctor, guess what? There were 5 BIG clients there , and I mean BIG. Each took approximately 15 minutes , that makes it almost an hour plus of my waiting time. By the time I got home, it was 4.55 pm – way of scheduled time. But I am glad she’s fine after the medication.

Disaster Two: Step-Father – Vanished?
Just when I was about to get out of the house, my mom called me saying “I am really worried for your step-father, his handphone cant be reached(the singtel mobile customer you’re calling is currently unavailable), and he isn’t at home(hes supposed to be there at around 2-3pm, and its 5!)” So I immediately became duty bound to check out my step-dads house because I was on the way down to leng kee CC(which is so near my step dads house). Gideon who was with me decided to come with me. When I arrived there, to my pleasant surprise – no lying body, no foul odour(touch wood). No car in the carpark, no human at home. So I showed Gideon around my house till 6.10pm(okay I was supposed to reach leng kee by 7pm to collect my jersey for the payar lebar cup). Cool, he decided to go to the CC first, because I feared for any ‘unforseen’ circumstances. So I waited….waited…..waited….. till my mom came home rushing in, doing this doing that and letting off steam because she just cant contact my step father, and if phones explode, she would have blown off a couple by then. Waiting……still waiting….till 7.10pm when my step-father finally called! Okay to my relief, but I was late(very late) for my leng kee CC training.

Disaster Three: Payar Lebar cup? Not fated?
Okay I’ll skip the hussle on what happened, but generally we were supposed to be collecting these jerseys for our payar lebar cup( I was selected by default). I got my jersey, no. 13, I was DELIGHTED, because firstly its my idol no. , Steve Nash, Phoneix Suns, lead the league in assist. But we had a tweeny problem, we have 14 people , and the competition rules are, only 12 are allowed. The two odd ones were Andrew(hes our Center, because our coach ah xiao wants him to play for us so he shouldn’t be considered ‘odd’ but just slighty behind time) and another guy jun an brought. At that point, I didn’t know he came for the FIRST time! I really didn’t. I thought he was part of the main 12. So we had to kick out two reserves, one was decided to be the weakest point guard(unfortunately I know not his name) and the other? Undecided. I saw pei kun(our captain) was in a dilemma, big one. He didn’t know who to sit out, everyone was his friend, team mate and his buddies. Seeing this, I really couldn’t bare to see him make any decisions that may split the team apart, so now we have 13 person(the odd one I mentioned should by default be the reserve because he DIDN’T came for the selection before – a fact I knew a few hours later). So I decided to sit out, I told pei kun, you guys go ahead, enjoy your cup, I’ll support from the side-lines. No hard feelings. I gave up my jersey and I walked away. I appeared okay then, but inside I was tearing up, I worked hard for this cup but anyway no matter. As a matter of fact I was SICK(for 3 months –yes the cough), and I decided to get healthy first, work on my game and play the leng kee cup which will fall during January. I of course terribly regret this decision, because fact is, that guy I gave up to , according to some people, wasn’t good at all(he threw up an air ball twice or something). But I have made the decision and I stick by the consequences. The bright side to this is that I’ll automatically be in the leng kee cup team(without going through selections) and that’s the consolation. I’ll work on my game this month and make sure I beat every single player in leng kee.

Michael Jordan got cut from high school team, but he didn’t back off, because he loved the game, he came back a better player, and eventually the best guard in the world.

Relationship

2004-11-26T07:30:00.000-08:00

Okay today i came across this quote on the internet and i gave it a few other thoughts myself, and then decided to jot this down here. The quote is "The best relationship is one where your love for each other exceeds your need for each other" . I was really impressed by this quote because thats EXACTLY what , in my opinion, people nowadays dont understand. I think the quote if pretty self explainatory so i wont go on to elaborate on it.

Another few things i've liked to add is people are too much in a hustle to get a boyfriend/girlfriend.(This generally targets people aged between 14 - 21) Why? The same reason why people get spiky hair, hip-hop clothes,expensives mp3, outrageous handphone changes every few weeks, dine and feast like the end of the world is tomorrow and last but not least, smoking.(etc) This may sound unrealistic or shocking , i think most people's first reaction is "But all these are objects! Getting a girlfriend/boyfriend isnt like getting objects!", true, i dont deny this statement, however, on the other hand, it is precisely because, it is 'cool', 'okay', 'appropriate', 'essential' and 'part of teenage life' . This creates something mental in us, and thats called mentality. So we are looking at rushing relationships,like this

guy:Oh shes so pretty
guy thinks:It isnt the outside actually its the inside, i'll try to know her better
guy approaches girl and engage in casual conversation
guy: Hey my name is Jason, whats yours?
girl:My name is May, nice to meet you (okay shes polite)
guy:So how are you liking school?
girl:Schools cool, great facilities, great teachers, awesome people and great food(whow shes outgoing)
guy:Oh good food, how about lunch together?
girl:sure thing, see you at 12 later(whow she agreed at once, she must feel something for me too)

At lunch

guy:so how are you getting along with your classmates?
girl:Oh they do little things that can be annoying at times but i think its good to forgive and forget(shes kind, compassionate and sensitive)
guy:how did you find your examinations? i thought they were tough
girl:yeah they were pretty tricky, but i think i'll be okay.(Oh! shes humble and hardworking)
eats lunch and talk over in the mean time

What i am trying to illustrate here is how easy it is to be HIGHLY OPTIMISTIC about the other party when on e has this kind of mentality. Over a matter of hours, you've decided shes your girlfriend. Never has thoughts like "Maybe shes trying to put on her best behaviour" crossed our minds, so we're not being fair to ourselves and the other party. Also, how many of us has actually weighed the imbalance a relationship can cause in our lifes? Have you ever pondered on how much less time you'll get with your peers, how your studying hours will drop etc. Some argue "If you think so much before a relationship, you'll never get into one" , this may sound perfectly alright at first glance, but think again! That means you're saying, we should be impulsive and adopt the "JUST DO IT' thing? Thats plainly being irrational and a likely excuse. But for those who die by this statement, how much thoughts have you given to your studies? Too often i hear "Why should i study so hard?" , "I'll just try to scrape a pass so i can have more time for other stuff" , aint this thinking? Does that mean you should not think so much and just STUDY? Thats a point we should really put our thinking caps and meditate for one day or so.

So what i am trying to say is, dont try to follow the trend, people are becoming a couple at the age of 10, thats ridiculous. You guys have heard that the reason why its not good is because of lack of maturity, drunkers know not being drunk, those who admit they're immature wont go into a relationship! Those who does are full of themselves(this may be an overstatement but mostly), thinking they're so matured, able to handle anything that comes(i doubt they even ever gave this a thought), and starts to whine , feel sad, cry under your pillow when your parthner goes on a holiday with his/her family. Hopefully, this will let you see some light, before going into a relationship, please consider every aspect, theres nothing to lose thinking a week more, only alot to gain. This is being responsible and fair to yourself, your parthner and your family.

"The best relationship is when your love for everyone around you exceeds your need for each other"

If you have any comments please leave a comment(well ya), or if you dont want to make it 'public' please send it to :

satty20032003@yahoo.com.sg

Thanks for reading through(i know its long)

Happy + Fruitful

2004-11-25T22:36:00.000-08:00

Thks miss chang, trust me i'll:)
This will be a long post, fruitful day it is.

Interesting Morning
Today morning was kinda tiring for me, i woke up at 6.30 am(i slept at 12am), i was feeling VERY tired, i dragged my lazy soles to the toilet...and i forgot what i did...the next thing i know was i was back lying down in my bed..7am crept quickly in and i dropped jun rong a morning call to wake him up for our meeting later. Being an exceptionally punctual person, i had a quick breakfast and left my house to meet jun rong , appointment time was 8am, but i was at his doorsteps at 7.45am, that became a joke of the day but it was cool:D We decided to have a cup of coffee and i must admit its my FIRST ever cup of coffee in a coffee shop, i dont normally drink coffee, but i was too tired so i better have it, also to handle the job later on. We(JR and me) had promised our great coach Ah Xiao(seow) to help to be the officials in a friendly match(bball of course) between dunman high(away team) and bukit view(home team), we arrived there at 9am sharp only to be greeted 'Wha xian zai zhi dian le'(whow whats the time now) said ah seow, and i was "Kan la, gan cai jiao ni zuo TAXI ni bu yao"(i told you to catch a cab but you declined) to jun rong, then our coach say 'Wha da TAXI, wo qin ni men lai shi mei you bao TAXI de hor"(Sry but being my officials dont include transportation fee).

The Favour
To our shock , i was suppose to do the scoresheet(a piece of paper which records points scored by players, personal fouls, team fouls etc) , and jun rong was suppose to be the referee for the match, i was well not prepared for this but still went on. Good thing i could get the secondary 1's bballers to help out with the job and made it easier. The match was nice, although jun rong missed out alot of foul calls, but he was also in a difficult position because normally theres suppose to be two referees at both sides but today jun rong had to cover both sides of the court ALONE, but of course no one blamed him, because both coaches(From both teams) sang the same tune, and i agreed, "If you want to whine about the referee not doing a good job, he is more than willing to give up his voluntary job as a referee and hand the whistle around your neck" , in short "Action speaks louder than words".

The Match
Match was cool, bukit view had a slow start in the quarter but fought back from a 6 point deficiet to tie the score at 12-12 after the first period, after that, they slowly worked their way to a win of 55-35-a blowout match. It wasnt a showcase of superstars , but it was surely a good eye opener for me, to view the match from such close distance! Met a few cool guys, jun kai (no.7) , and someone thats no.8, guo xiang or something. They were cool people, they thanked me and jun rong liked we did a great thing for them, but it was only a little favour. I felt really appreciated and went on to make friends with jun kai(because he was jun rong's friend), we basically hit if off pretty well...and we went to mac for a meal..and the topic goes to what guys always talk about, GIRLS. Cool chat with jun kai and jun rong, went home after that.

Afternoon
Came home at 1.30 pm, asked gideon out for basketball immdiately, because the sky's colour does not bode well - and i was not to be wrong. We went to yuhua CC to play, there were no one around to play with us, so we started to shoot Jumpers(Js), i knocked a few missed a few, got a feel of my shot and soon came 3 kids, we played a little and it started to ...well show symtomps of a downpour... so we ran home(my house actually), okay maybe we didnt run...we hustled.. we bought bubble tea at the new stall opened, i being greedy, ordered two cups - decision to be regretted, chocoalate milk tea and strawberry milktea, went home play NBA live 2004 + X-Men , by the time i finished those two cups, i was on the verge of puking, i took HALLS, drank water, everything i tried, nothing i tried worked, morale of the story - dont drink milk tea in cupS .

Well generally that summarises my day for today

day with mix emotions

2004-11-24T23:49:00.000-08:00

Results are out
Extremely satisfied with my results, i performed up to expectations set by myself, parents and peers. And miss chang, if you're reading this, i got a distinction for CRS! thats a tribute to you, without your guidance and frequent jokes i doubt i can make it so far! thanks!! I am elated by my results and have given myself a pat on my shoulder , i will continue to perserver, and to those critics who says basketball and studies dont mix, heres something to comtemplate on!:)

Training
Today's training was filled with mix emotions, i was happy i am finally able to jump 2 chairs on a standard basis, although my leg gave way before i could finish the setted target, coach asked me to stop for fear of a re-curring ankle injury. I am glad for that:) I was happy througout, the 5-5 was pretty fun, i tried center position, i felt i did pretty well for a rookie at center, i nailed a fade away, used the jump hop taught by a coach from america well(twice) and made two baskets. I did get a few blocks, but they were called for foul, how true i dont know, because i was sure i had 2 clean blocks but anyway no matter, i really enjoyed playing center for once:) The end of the training was what totally irritated me, and those people were the ones who should've know better , i dont wish to bring up this issue because i think its meanglinless to do so, but watch your backs dudes, here comes 'The Dream II' , i am gonna master my game and get more game , and be sure to count on me to screw you guys:)

lost hand phone

2004-11-22T22:05:00.000-08:00

somehow my previous entry didnt go through ... never mind about that, today is a really not so pleasant day fer me, simply because i lost my handphone and its a 6610I! I was playing basketball when this 3 guys came and behave suspiciously around the area i left my pouch, i know one of those guys, and the next thing i know was my phone disappeared!!=( After that i remained calm telling myself , ok my phone is stolen, you can whine and kick a big fuss out of it but your phone aint returning, so i decided to make a police report, i did and it took very long(2 hours), but i figured it was worth it because it would serve as a warning if that guy was nabbed! And also thanks to darren fer being my withness=)

Training
I returned to training on sunday, and i must really say i've lost alot of myself, staminia wise and ability to recover from fatigue, totally lost it. Mainly i guess its because of the weather, it was so hot i could start frying eggs, and also because of the lack of water, because i cant drink too much in between breaks or else my stomach will be too bloated. 5-5 was fun as usual, but i didnt enjoy it ALOT because my back was aching like mad, i couldnt stand still without feeling the pain, i couldnt run much either, but i made a couple of shots, blocked a couple, rebounded nicely, i didnt dish out anything though.

2004-11-16T20:44:00.000-08:00

Been a while since i last updated , sry my folks

Cough
Sadly, the promethazine magic didnt work, i finished 2 whole bottles of it and i am still coughing, *sigh* , so my mom brought me to see this doctor at 'yu ren sheng' at tiong bahru plaza fifth floor, he gave me 21 packets of medication to be finished in a ONE WEEK duration, when i first heard it, i was like 'okay all doctors do that, so i'll recover in a day or two', to my dismal, it was not to be. i am into the fourth day of the medication, i do not deny that i have gotten better, but i dont think i am fully recovered, i am half way there. I'll update a FULL story of this incident once i recover, i have a habit of recapping past incidents after i recover from it, when i got dengue fever this april, i didnt jot down my thoughts in the computer, i put it in my mind, i told myself, i must live to tell the story. So only after i have fully recovered will i write down what happened, so for now, thats all for my cough, but be sure to look out for a long article of it once i have recovered:)

Basketball
I havent played for 5 days now, since last thursday, and i am trying to stay strong . Because of my cough, i cant play, although i have been doing it for the past 2 months(yes i have been coughing for two months!), my doctor told me not to exercise till i recover, i look forward to the date of my recovery and you can trust me to put up my most enthuastic moment of my life in a basketball court:)

Dengue:
here are four articles i have uploaded for your enjoyment,in it describes how i felt during the time i gotten dengue and how i lived through it, they're long, click on the link and you'll be lead to another window, click on the 'Click here to download file' and the article is yours to enjoy!

(I)http://s6.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=5CC6345BDDB9FA611B1705EBC9190A63 (road to hospital)

(II)http://s6.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=D485FAA9C322B37EA00A7C2AD1E15F47 (road to hospital + staying)

(III)http://s6.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=80F913EA5B104C0BE1FA01E1E22B959F (unbearable night)

(IV)http://s6.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=77D2F695CA3C31BA2FEEA07B4FB019BD (discharge)

i hope you enjoy it!

peace ima out

short entry, due to sadness

2004-11-08T04:29:00.000-08:00

Basketball
Today went out with Jun Rong to play bball, hes deproved alot due to lack of practice which is in turn due to his 'O' levels, but his shots has tremendous improvement, i suppose, when you understand the concept of SWISH shooting(www.swish22.com), you simply can shoot, no matter the time, because its just so much a reliable method, jun rong is one example! He was knocking down at least 7 of 10 of his mid range jumpers!! Had fun

Sadness
Today i feel sad again, because i have been pang seh once again, i dont wanna say what happened, but i can only say this has happened so many uncountable times.

great great day

2004-11-05T01:06:00.000-08:00

Exam
Today’s CPPA was totally awesome, it was so difficult, I nearly ‘peng’ at the sight of it, we were given 10 minutes to read, but I couldn’t finish reading the questions! Because I was busy using the ‘search’ mode in my brain to find a solution to every question,(or the rough outline), I could do that for all my other exams except this one! But once I started, I went smoothly, a few questions I couldn’t do, just skipped, there was this question that request us to convert from ‘Joules’ to ‘bar’, in my mind I as like ?? out of point! Was comforting to know almost everyone didn’t know how to do that, the rest was a sweep,just went on and felt more and more confident until I hit the last question, I was pondering on it until I finally found the solution! Its gives us this equation: (CH2)n + O2 à CO2 + H2O balance this equation, at first I was like ‘??’ again.. because n can be ANY number, so the best way is to work in terms of n, later I found the relationship which was: 2(CH2)n + (3n)O2 à (2n)CO2 + (2n)H2O, this is true for all positive values of n, I was very happy! I went on to solve and found the answer(13.1%)!! Yes!

After-math of exams
After exams I was like ‘FREE!’ ,no more worrying over chemical formulas when I am training, not more not being able to train to my fullest because of exam worries.

Basketball to celebrate exams
Met up with ABC(aaron, ben and chee.peikun), which subsequently joined by john(athan), fab(ian) AKA little-shaq , we all had nick names , it was a fun and lame afternoon! We were joking around like mad, pei kun said hes an ‘All Star’ and we were like oh ‘Oua Sau’ which meant black sand in hokkien and we were laughing like mad, then there was this spectacular pass made and we were like ‘miao chuan’(magic pass), then aaron was laming and said huh? Miao which is temple, chuan which is boat? You meant temple has boats? We were all like -_- , but nevertheless it was fun, we never wanted to play each other, out scored each other, or what, we just went out there and had fun, in the name of the game, we weren’t looking to block shots, no hard-up Defense, no rough moves, we just went out there and played for fun!

5-5
We were asked to play a 5-5 with the opposing court players, we were all tired, but we still obliged,basically it was a sweep from the start, they didn’t understand the game, you can tell, they were in a mess and we were kinda in a controlled ‘mess’, we won 11-4 with pei kun leading the scoring board with 5 points(out of 11) , aaron 2, me 2, Fabian 2, and we won, aaron had loads of rebounds, but captialise little because there were always like 3 person on him whenever he grabbed the rebound, had a few assists too!

Great play: (play-by-play followed by commentary)
Play number one: Fabian with the rebound, throws a baseball pass upcourt to peikun on the break, peikun to the drive goes to the up and under and he scores! What determination! He saw the rebound ball, didn’t wait, had that confidence in his team mates and sprinted down court for the score and the foul!

Player number two: Pei kun to the drive , runner no good, rebounded by aaron, hes tripled team , aaron tries for two, gets it and it’s a three point play oppourtunity! What a spectacular shot. He was tripled, didn’t care, focus, absorbs the contact and went up hard for the two!! Execellent body control and feel for the ball

Player number three: Now pei kun looks to drive the ball up-court, he looks for the open man, passes it down to Fabian.. Fabian passes it back to him, pei kun with the open-look tries for trey! YES! What a smooth stroke, it almost gave me goosebumps when it hit nothing but net!

Last play: X looks to drive the ball up-court, it’s a 2 on 1, he drives pass his man, now faced by another defender, he goes straight to the hoop…..YES! a beautiful leftie that time! He knew he was going to get a foul, but followed through and made that shot! Spectacular!

After game: After game was lunch, we were all complaining we couldn’t eat, for some reasons after a bball game you just cant seem to fit anything into your stomach, I managed to ‘gobble’ down my pizza and garlic bread together with a whole cup of root beer,pei kun gave his chicken a skip(ate one of two), and ordered the ‘take away’ for his potatoes, we were also laming over lunch, loads of jokes, its been a long time since I felt so happy, being around with friends, just chit chatting, I really felt great, and appreciated, It was so much fun. I don’t think I can experience this kind of feeling with my normal friends and mates. I really had fun!And I feel really happy! Yep! Thanks guys! This is a tribute to you muah mates! Hopefully we’ll get out there and WHA soon again! Take care till then. Peace.

Buddhism

2004-11-04T19:32:00.000-08:00

I have been a buddhist for a very long time now(6 years or so), i think its a great form of education for everyone of any age. Many misunderstand that buddhist are those who goes to the temple and pray , after which they go home, thats not a 'true' buddhist but a 'psuedo' one. A true buddhist need not go to a temple, need not have a buddha's statue nor does he need to burn incense everyday, a true buddhist is one who follows the path to eliminating all attachments, including greed, anger, love ecetera. I do not consider going to temples fun at all, in fact i find that its not a need to, praying to buddha's statue is only a reflection/reminder that we must work hard on our main goal, removing all attachments and desires. So, many misunderstand the concept of a 'true buddhist', a true buddhist will never tell you he is one, a true person with wisdom will not tell you hes wise. You may have heard of those super-natural powers displayed by monks, but you've never seen them? Thats because those who have them dont show it, the reason is because its pointless to do so, people should take up buddhism not for those powers, but for elminating attachments, and those powers are but a by-product. I think buddhism has helped me alot through the way, both physically and mentally. Its a great education which once used, will reap great results

Cheerful day

2004-11-04T10:48:00.000-08:00

TRAINING
training yesterday was kinda cool, there was a very new happening guy named Jun An, hes those joker type (i am also haha), so i clicked quite well with him, we were just going at each other , trying to taunt one another and stuff like these. We generally did the same things but the first thing i noticed when i got there WAS, all the equipment has been taken out, and laid nicely for us, that could only mean one thing, judgement day! I was sure our coach ah xiao wanted to train us to the limit that time, but the sky saved our lifes, it rained, much to our relief. But we still did many things, jumping chairs(i just realised we've been short changing ourselves by 1/2 long long ago), bending backs, ecetera(the usual), 5 basics(never fails to kill) and lay up(sounds easy? think again), 100 repetition on each side! The team didnt perform well, they were missing way way too many lay ups, i only missed one right handed(our of 20++), due to the coach suddenly exclaiming "dont look at the ball while dribbling", i looked up to him and lost control! leftie, missed 2 out of many, the others missed alot more.

My fishes
Did a water change fer them today, they looked pretty happy at that as their bright colours returned again, and they generally became more active, nothing is more relaxing than watching your fishes swim across the tank cheerfully(well if you've been with them long enough you'll know), and doing those nifty moves, ah , luxury!

Cough
My cough has gotten alot better now, the frequency has decreased and the magnitude also, this is not complicated science , its just, its gotten better in short. Thanks to the medication 'Rhintanol Promathazine' , now i believe, you pay what you get, i once used to drink those S$4/bottle promanthazine, and it took me 2 bottles to get slighty better, but now, i am drinking the S$12/bottle one, and i havent even finished half and i am already recovering alot quicker(and mind you, that syrup tastes so SWEET, its so addictive!its sweeter than coke). So morale of the story? Dont always go for cheap doctors, sometimes, doesnt matter paying that little cent more to recover faster, nothing is more important than your health!

that is all.

exam blues

2004-11-02T10:50:00.000-08:00

MIP
Studying for MIP(materials in practice) was MIP(mission impossible), reason being that it is the subject that i fret most as it is very memory base and my memory aint very good. It was raining when i arrived at school but i still went through the rain despite being offered an umbrella(because they were girls and theres this saying 'nan nu suo suo bu qing'), so i've rather go through that bit of rain. Then came the paper, when i first browsed through it , the first thought i had 'Oh my, i've be glad to scrape a pass', so once i began, i never stopped, i kept writing like a lunatic till my hands were sore,but i still continued in fear that i'll forget some information, and when i finished , i still had 1 hour and 10 minutes left to check, heck that, i checked through and left with 50 minutes left.

Cough
I had this very chronic cough since a few months back, those who know me will know, but its getting better since i got a medication called 'promethazine', it helped clear flamn and now i am all better! except it causes drowsiness, which leads to..

Long sleep...ZZzzzZZzzz
Yesterday i slept for a very very very long time, i took my medication and had dinner, i went to bed at approximately 6.30pm,i slept all the way to 9.15pm and decided to use the computer, but i reckon i was so tired that i couldnt continue and therefore i fall squarely onto the bed again..all the way till this morning when i woke up at 9am, scary, i slept for 15 hours , this goes to show that i havent had enough sleep at all, so from today,i wont skip my sleeping hours no more!

Friends
i think all of my peers are facing the same pressure as me, from the SMSes i can tell, they are short, jumpy and you can tell, insensitive(who cares about sensitivity when you're hard up on studying), so i guess poly life isnt as easy as many percieved!! But i guess the best policy is that same policy you've heard of, study everyday, when exam comes, you still get your normal life(i went to play bball one day before my O levels), because if you have been doing so, exams are but nothing, i always tell myself, when i am doing an exam, i am writing only writing a better standard answer then the examiners, thats my only goal! Although not inachieveable, i guess that really boosts my confidence
All the best to your exams(and mine)

mix feelings

2004-10-31T20:11:00.002-08:00

Mission Impossible

Today i was supposed to revise my MIP(materials in practice), but didnt get a chance to do so in the morning because i needed to go and pray with my family(guan yin temple), after that victor wanted to asked me out to valley point and study, however my mom felt that it was too far so i had to call it off as well. Got home, changed.. and..guess what? i fell squarely on the bed after reading a few chapters on 'ceramics are....metals..are...ZzzZZzZZz', i got up and decided to continue on it and i went 'Rheology of materials...' and i went to a buddhist book and this went on until i finally finished my MIP revision, i would also like to refer it to as (M)ission (I)m-(P)ossible, now i just pray for the best and hopefully i'll scrape through this subject.

Friends not in good moods
Today i could tell that a few of muah friends werent in a very good mood(i myself wasnt either), it was most probably due to examination stress (like pei kun and aaron) and some love problems (like ....). But i think everything would be fine!

Coughing
This cough has been with me for a few months now,and i really cant wait to ditch it! i tried almost every medication,cough syrups to inhalers ,and am now on a newest eastern medication, it seems to have some effect on me now that i do feel better and i hope i ditch it quick, this is the second time i have had this!!!

mix feelings

2004-10-31T20:11:00.001-08:00

mix feelings

2004-10-31T20:11:00.000-08:00

Memorable Day

2004-10-28T07:39:00.000-07:00

Happy Again

Couple of reasons to be happy again. First off….

Coast is Clear
I cleared my misunderstandings with shi ping, no more hard feelings, we both agreed we’re just two men in the foulest possible mood meeting at the same exact time, so we let it go, one of the reasons is what Michael Jordan said, in a certain year, he was accused of telling his team mates not to pass to someone(forgot who), but he said “As a team, we knew the truth, we never talked about it, they knew I never said it and we just went on”, since shi ping and I are in the same team, I think we should trust each other, so ya there you go, doubts cleared. Gideon part? More of less just get on with life, I think I’ll just to accept him as who he is.

Training
Today’s training was totally awesome. Fun filled training, someone new came, his name is ‘jun an’, 16 and he lives in the woodland area, hes very atheletic(well he trains in the school gym club or something like that), all the physical stuff was a breeze for him. Except, the jumping of chairs.. it wasn’t so much of the physical, but a lot more on the mental aspect of that drill. Anyway, our coach ah xiao(Seow) was extremely happy, because a lot of his ex-bballers and friends came, so he was in a good mood.. and today block 108 was so filled with people, people from yuhua CC and ah xiao friends and bballers. During the triangular offense training, I kept on getting picked on(well it’s a good thing, at least he still picks on me), my passing wasn’t good, I wasn’t running fast enough, ecetera, but the main reason probably because I pulled a thigh, I was limping when I was doing those drills…..but its okay now!
We had a 4 on 4 later, me ,shi ping, jun an and shi long, against….oh my.. ah xiao ex-bballers! Now that is what we often call ‘mis-match’ and our ‘match-ups’ were all such cases, they have taller players, bigger sized players.. but we went out did the things we did but lost 10-11, we played well, but they were just the better atheletes, if we had taken our time to set up our offense, if we had focus on defense, if we had box-out on every shot attempt, we could’ve won. And if, we threw our elbows and buttocks in every direction, we’ve won the match.

Night Chat
Today had a very very very(okay this probably wont end)…….good chat with my buddies from DCP(dating confirm problematic), aaron and pei kun! We really talked a lot of rubbish, and the things guys talk about(*hint*), then we talked basically about everything in the world.. from how pei kun wasn’t informed about the postphoning of the meeting, to Aaron favourite past time, to our coach ah xiao, to the girl I love and everything, we chatted from 11pm to almost 3am, if not for aaron’s router problem, we would have gone all day, that’s just my guess.
At the time I enter this entry, I have only had 4 hours of sleep, and guess what, I don’t feel half a bit tired, I don’t feel like sleeping, I am energetic, maybe because of friends encouragement? And I think I’ve said this too many times, its so great to know pk and A, they’re like my brothers!(brudders) cheers man!

2004-10-27T16:03:00.001-07:00

another day of nothing

2004-10-27T16:03:00.000-07:00

Ap Chem Paper
Todays ap chem paper wasn’t as difficult as anyone expected, most found it easy, I left the room a while before the exam officially ended, took the Italian noodles(I forgot how to spell spagaetti) , creamy ones, added break and omelette ,I think that’s how u spell it, cost S$3.70 in total, price is okay not that bad, victor was out also, actually he came out first, if not for him, I wouldn’t know can leave early. Then after that we generally all went home. I tried a new way home today, took 105, quite fun.. new route everything.
After that, I went to 108 to get my shoes, new hang out and everything, my coach there, then I saw him in the rain getting his lunch out of the car, then he again went into the rain to get my shoes(how touching), after that we talked a abit, after which I went home.

Moody
I am feeling very moody now, mostly because of what happened yesterday, the thought of it just upsets me totally. But anyway there are so many other reasons, one is my grandma, shes always asking me DO THIS DO THAT, GET THIS GET THAT. And I am so irritated by that, I don’t blame her for asking me , but I just hope next time she would appreciate what I do and stop ordering me around, she wants to govern my room, my life and everything and I cannot take IT!!!!!I feel like punching something , anything, I am in a rage , a very strange one too, I want to scream, but I guess I will be okay after a while.

Training
I don’t look forward to training at all, for the first time since I started, the thought of meeting G and P(as I mentioned below), just turns me down side up. I wouldn’t think I will enjoy myself but again this may be a good opportunity to reconciled , but if fate doesn’t agree I’ll just leave it at that, I am as it is, troubled enough, and have no time for such matters. I have exam matters, love matters, family matters and basketball matters, too much things at once to still want to think about this problem. I am tired , suffocating , I need a break, a rest whatever.

truly disappointing day

2004-10-26T19:23:00.000-07:00

I have never felt so bad before, the two best pals i THOUGHT i had actually just did something i wont believe they do. Maybe i am over critical, but i'll state my stand here, maybe it may sounds like i am petty or unreasonable, but hey this is a blog and i think i should jot down EXACTLY how i feel here.

Yesterday a friend of mine,lets call him P, he was in some trouble and felt upset, so he decided to talked about something 'serious' , not to my knowledge, and decided he would block everyone so as not to be disturbed(i am not sure if he did, because the other friend of mine, G, actually said he was online). When G told me he was online, i immdiately felt very betrayed because he actually blocked me and not G, maybe i am overly critical about this, but i feel that he shouldnt have done that, as it was a sign of disrespect to me and i think thats ultimately the not so mature thing to do. I think he shuld've just said he was busy and didnt want to talk then, or he could just put his title as 'busy atm, please do not disturb', i think those are more appropriate solutions.

After that i managed to pull off how i felt to P, and he didnt say much but one thing he shouldnt have said was "To say the truth, nobody complained except you", i wanted to say "thats only because they didnt know you block them until you told them you did", but i knew, i knew he blocked me way before he told me, so i think whats he was trying to say(maybe he wasnt, but that was a impression he left on me) was that i am petty and i am the only one whining about this. And G was there trying to say i was wrong so that P would feel better? a few things he mentioned "See you always jump to conclusions" , "You are too petty" etc, i felt so hurt, if i always jumped to conclusions i wouldnt have forgived you when you didnt turn up for bball, if i was too petty, i would not have listened to all the rubbish you told me and all the crap .

I dont know, i treated them like my own brothers, even closer. Even those around me could tell, i put my title on msn as " The two of you disappointed me.."", and my friend yun "harry" sheng could immdiately pin point who it was, and to think i only meet him once a week, and that was matters 2 months ago(i havent seen him in months), even his brother could tell,everyone could tell i gave them the best, i did everything i could for them, i was close to them, i think only they didnt see this matter, and i am truly disappointed by their act .

that is all.

something i wanted to say....from day one in sp

2004-10-25T20:41:00.000-07:00

Maybe its me, or maybe its just fate, the people in my class this year simply dont fit my character/personality at all. One of the most obvious case would be, no one enjoys basketball as i do in class.. not even a person! And i think i am more of towards those sensitive, loyal, fun loving, lame and full of rubbish person. But my class people are totally out of this class of personality, i cant communicate with them, i dont talk they 'LAN' langauge like them and i cant seem to fit with them at all. When i try to talk with them, i just cant find any common interests, they like computer games, while i find computer games totally not my type, they watch reality shows but i thought it was lame, they eat all the food i dont fancy , they do all the things i dont normally do. I feel kinda left out and can be quite down in class at times, especially when you just feel so alone(and thats my greatest fear). I miss my mates in secondary school and i wish i could turn the clocks of time. I really really miss the days we had....really..

On the other hand, i fit nicely into another bunch of friends from sp also from DCP(commonly known as Dating Confirm Problematic), they really suits me alot, as lame as i am , knows how to joke, likes to hang out at places, enjoys bball and loyal as well. I am really greatful for such friends !!!!they're, (A)aron, (B)en, (C)hee pei kun, yep the ABCs of some class and of course not forgetting, jun rong, chun hoe swee guan shi long shi ping and gideon!

my long lost mates , spencer , yi chuan, yun sheng etc etc.

stuff

2004-10-25T08:49:00.000-07:00

Training:

Yesterday’s training was quite okay attendance wise , but it totally went upside down when it comes to practical time. We were supposed to do the five basics(w & w/o bball) and then run the 4 folds, after this I was like panting like mad. After that we realized that we forgot to jump ‘chairs’ , I was already very giddy to begin with , so it was only natural I hit the chair and nearly fell a few times.. After that was the most atrocious thing, we were supposed to run the full length of the court for a lay up after that run back and jump over chairs to finish off the lay up, I admit it was very tiring,(judging by the times the coach scream at me “yu song ah, how many times must I say, agility is the essence to this drill!!!” ), but I don’t see how on earth can players sit there and forgo their turns, and the result? Me and Gideon had to run like mad dogs because we didn’t have enough time to rest(because the others were skipping their turn saying ‘you go first’), I was so annoyed at them. Besides, they are like prince when they came for training, lazy, refuse to help out with the loading/unloading of stuff..

I got my ‘revenge’ tho when we had the 3 on 3 competition after that, I decided to play center, out of my usual position(shooting guard), so I went on and scored on them like I was mad, although I was in a controlled rage, I would nail fade aways, drive the hoop, and score on them until one of them exclaimed ‘Not you again! Someone D him!’, okay a little arrogant.. yeah.. but I was really playing as if I was possessed!

Other Stuff:
Other interesting stuff for Sunday.. Saturday was Aaron’s birthday, but too bad I couldn’t go for his party , well at least I said happy birthday haha ;) Sunday was more interesting, because I was busy sending sms(es) to aaron, wei ming, pei kun and jun rong. It was very fun smsing people and I felt like they were right beside me. Anyway other than that, I was pretty much feeling bored …bored…bored…bored…still very bored.. I was at a relative’s house that’s why!!! I go there every week on Saturday and Sundays.. and I never fail to feel BORED! I don’t enjoy watching TV, so that leaves me with NOTHING to do.. but sleep.. eat..sleep..eat.. listen to a little radio and nothing else to do.. BORING! Yep enough of whining.. that’s all fer today folks!
That is all.

aaron ...then hakeem olajuwon

2004-10-21T09:18:00.000-07:00

Now its past midnight but i am still not very sleepy, mainly because of my friend aaron, i think i have another reason to wake up feeling happier everyday because i have found a friend who shares pretty common values..in chinese thats called 'Zhi Tong Dao He', well yep. I have only a few of these friends but i am glad one more has entered the list. allow me to say thank you here.

I realised today that i need to improve my bball, not that i realised it first time in many years but i need to develop another type of my game. Too often i am too obssessed with what type of player others want me to be, but today i realised, only by developing on my own game can i really be myself. I was always told shooting the ball was the best player. but today i shall change that philosophy of mine, i just saw hakeem olajuwon videos today(not the first time) , but i think i've liked to develop a game similiar to that of his, command the low post area, of course i'll add my own variation, i may not be tall, but i have a reasonable size and height(177cm or so), and i predict i will continue growing because i only starting growing at around sec 2 and 3.

I learned a bit of hakeem olajuwon's game through videos and some commentary on him in a website i found. I really liked the way he played, and i am going to work on it, improve upon it and call it my own. wish my success.

that is all.

happy .. for now

2004-10-21T08:51:00.000-07:00

Today i woke up feel fresh, happy and light. Maybe because of the good chat i had with [P]ei [K]un and Aaron! i think i was smiling throughout the conversation and laughing(softly just so it wont wake my family up), we chatted from 11pm to 1am.. it was great great fun, i havent been able to talk to anyone like this for a long time, i mean its not everday someone your age and someone whom you can relate to comes by ya? Pk and Aaron happens to be one of the few i have came across whom i can immdiately relate to and have fun talking to them. Well ya, i hope we could go out more often with many many such friends and go to many many places and have loads of fun, i supposed thats what people call youth!

anyway i didnt plan much for today, i mean no school, yep. So i'll just stay at home till 3 pm or so and go out for a bball game, come home hoping to get a good chat with my friends on msn , it've be best if its pk again and aaron again or jun rong again.. whow they lighten my day up the most! OKay i would also not mind some anynomous female chatting, because its been long since i last had one, and it'll be better if shes from my school, and better if shes from my course and much much better if she has everything i am looking for, not so good if shes not a chinese haha.

So yep thats it for a quiet peaceful thursday morning with 'It's my Life' as background music.

cya

that is all.

2004-10-20T08:15:00.002-07:00

moody

2004-10-20T08:15:00.001-07:00

Hey i dont know how on earth my post actually didnt pass through at first, so here i am re-writing it!.

Today was CRS test, it was quite difficult as the topic i chose was sensitive , ermmm..... it was 'if guys can be canned, why cant girls', i really didnt write much, but i disagree that girls should be canned, because they're 1)emotionally fragile 2)physically weaker 3)impractical(talk about canning a girl on her butt) 4)ineffective and lastly a solution to it all (miss chang if u're reading this do tell me if i can get an A with these useless point)

Then it was a fairly boring day for me, just keep on playing. On the way to training with shi ping and gideon, we really talk about of rubbish , we had fun (too bad pei kun couldnt come and shi long too). The moment we got there, it started to rain, i wasnt very happy, but i think we went on to train, physically, under the corridor. We did alot of stuff, weights, medicine ball exercises, jumping chairs, then at last we did some on court practice, 5 rounds of 3 pointers, and 5 basics, then we had a 2 on 2 game(obviously only 4 person is there), there was this new guy i didnt like him, okay he was okay character wise, but i didnt liked the way he played, too show off(not that he has much to show)and i had a 1 on 1 game with him , lost, mainly because i thought since he wanted to win so much, just let him win.. and i was on the verge of a asthma attack, didnt wanted to take the risk. Anyway, my first impression on him wasnt so good, show man with nothing to show.

So that conclude my day and i just found out my good friend pei kun has a blog(okay i was pretty sure i dont remember hearing this), so anyway do a little advertising for him, peikun87.blogspot.com, i found that after reading his blog, hes very similiar to me, okay maybe i wouldnt be specific,but some common points are loyalty to friends, absolutely righteous, sensitive, and a pretty good writer.... okay maybe we're also procrastinators.. read his blog and come back and read mine.. i see so many similiarities,(except i use proper english?) okay thats all for today, props to me haha

that is all.

2004-10-17T20:04:00.000-07:00

Managed to finish tutorial 6 today, got it all done with all the correct solutions, now i am feeling confident for tuesday's test.

These few days things has been going pretty well for me, friends wise, family wise and everything going quite smoothly, those whom has been reading thanks for reading and giving me advices when needed, up to my friend in school(i wont say who he here but big thanks) and to all my friends who stood by me during this time. I think i finally became who i am.

I think the biggest lesson i learned was to respect people and not force your view on them, let them have some free space. Do not tell them what to do or how they should feel , and especially dont tell them 'you're wrong' people hate to hear that, and i myself dread to hear that as well. Also, some things are better left unsaid. i am generalising all i have learned through this week which has changed my life 360 degrees, i am now a happier person who no longer am bugged by problems which has been pestering me for months.

My next aim is to work on my basketball game so i can make my mark in next year youth cup. I will announce it here in my blog(a mental note) my improvements.

Vertical: around 3-4 inch from rim
Shots: 7 of 10 FT , 5 of 10 FG, 2/10 3PT FG
Drive: Able to drive right, left .
Aim: Dribble better, jump higher, develop a better shot , master the reverse, and command the sky with the hook [shot].

ONE DAY I SHALL DUNK THE BALL THROUGH THE RIM, I SWEAR.

that is all.

2004-10-13T11:35:00.000-07:00

Today was a fairly good day for me, just that i decided to skip mr chida's lesson because i didnt think i'll be able to absorb much from him and decided to stay at home and do the character development book so that i wont be late for submission to mr nee.

During the course of these few days where i changed my approach to being a person, i noticed that people treated me differently as well, i started to notice that people were actually good to me but just that from before i was clouded by my own judgement to be able to see the goodness in the people around me, especially my classmates. Although my opinion of me being a mix blood still hasnt wavered much, i now begin to see that i am actually able to integrate into being part of them, but just a unique self. I have also learned to be more patient and to respect people's point of view instead of trying to force my opinion upon them.

all this is thanks to the book 'making friends' and of course my own determination to succeed in human relationships.

Now i would like to tribute 3 of my other good friends for being good friends:

Chun Hoe: Known you for 11 years and i would like to thank you for hearing me out whenever i am troubled and giving me advise when i need them. you're very easy going and a filial person.

Swee Guan aka Rui Yuan: You're a very funny person, you never fail to run out of jokes to tell, i never forget your quote of 'sin-ga-po lang buai sai po'(singaporeans cant be praised), you're also a very loyal friend whom never 'pang seh' people for most of the reasons others would.

Pei Kun: Thanks for always thinking of others before self and you've actually influence me and taught me by self how to treat others with respect. Thanks!

that is all.

compliments to my greatest 3

2004-10-12T21:49:00.000-07:00

i have worked out whats wrong with me so i think ima cool.

I am greatful to my great friends whom have impacted my life greatly, as a tribute, i'll show my appreciation for them here in this blogs(girl friend doesnt count because she isnt a friend, shes someone special:) )

Jun Rong:
Great guy! Very loyal to friends and will always think of them before yourself! You're also a very smart person whom uses that knowledge very well, you have great social skills and i admire you for that!
--> I am sorry JR for always giving you too many advices , i'll work on that from today onwards.
Shi Ping:
You're a humorous guy to have around and always try your best to go along with others even though you may not agree to it, i salute you for that because thats something i cant do!
--> i am sorry for always expecting too much from you( i enjoy your company too much haha), i never think in your shoes and i am working to changing all of that
Gideon:
You're a very optimisstic guy whom has your priorities set right! you're also a great organiser with things and never fail to deliver what you've said! you're also very willing to learn from others and generously accept others opinion on you gracefully!!
--> I sometimes comment excessively on you at the wrong time, also i can sound very unreasonable towards you at times, but i am glad you took it in your stride! i am changing and hope we can accomplish more!!

that is all.

2004-10-10T17:10:00.000-07:00

:: firstly thank miss chang for her advice, i'll try to work around it::

next i'll touch a little on gossip, which surronds me every weekday from 8am to 5 pm.

I'll just quote one example, and i leave the rest for you to find out. This example is on how you can misunderstand secondary information(when you didnt hear it first hand that is)

I didnt say she stole my money
now watch as i hold different emphasis on every different word

I didnt say she stole my money(but SOMEONE said it)
I didnt say she stole my money(I DEFINITELY didnt say it)
I didnt say she stole my money(but i INFERRED it)
I didnt say she stole my money(but SOMEONE stole it)
I didnt say she stole my money(but she did SOMETHING with it)
I didnt say she stole my money(she stole SOMEONE elses)
I didnt say she stole my money(she took SOMETHING ELSE)

(quoted off andrew matthews 'making friends)

Can you see? no syllable changed, its just a matter of emphasis, so lets say you hear something, it may already have been passed around, you may not understanding what the person truly meant in the first place(not even those there may be able to comphrehend that), what more if it has been distorted and 'added ingredients'?

hope i gave you some food for thought

that is all.

2004-10-08T21:57:00.000-07:00

My 'unique' family structure has made me very different from my peers around me. From young, i have always longed to go out, but never did have an oppourtunity, before primary 5 i was too young , after that, i was kept at home by my grand parent, until now, i finally have some freedom, but a bird with wings tied for 16 years may already not want to fly.

The first time i stepped foot on orchard road was when i was in singapore polytechnic 'president challenge' flag day(of course excluding when i went there with my family), the first time i went to a LAN shop was with my poly classmates, the time my peers spend time with people of their own age filled with hype and activity, is one-fifth the time i spend with people 3 times my age or more.

I therefore developed very differently, vastly different. While my peers were hyper, on going and open, i was quiet and conservative, many may find i talk alot, but actually i think thats a vain effort in trying to capture attention. I really dont have much to talk with my peers. I do not share common interests with them , they like pop, i appreicate classical, they watch televisions, i read books, they go online for games, i stick with basketball, and the most vast difference is the way we view things. I would say i view things in the 'older generation' view and they see it in the 'modern' day thing, i wouldnt pass judgement on which is better as to each his own.

But this makes me feel very lonely, although i do have a few friends who have part of me, and i can relate with them, most of my pals differ greatly from me. As i try to integrate to be like them, i realised their 16 years of living modernly was more than i could catch up with, i evolved, a proto-type of them which will forever be condemmed in their eyes, i am not like them. I can try to be but never will.

I am seriously upset by this fact, although i can never change it, i cannot turn the clock of time, i can only hope the waves ahead would be smooth sailing. I have gone through alot more emotionally than many of my age, i have faced loved ones talking about suicide, i faced bullies 4 years in my life, i faced ideas being forced into my defiant mind and no way i can resist, i faced society sooner than i am supposed to have to.

I am not sure what this has to say for my future,but in present, its definitely tormenting me, day by day, as i drift further into a dimension that belongs neither to this nor that, i have transformed into a mixed blood of the 60s and 20s. I face problems created between my ancestors and my time, i am fighting the civil war in china with nuclear warheads and impressive technology, if i were bush, i am ordering smithes to work on swords and arrows.

I am like a bird, wings tied and fed with cats food. Its almost hard to find someone like me then it is to catch a mosquitoe in an open field. I am tired, frustrated and unhappy. I long to be free, from all this and just enjoy life as it breezes pass me.

Longing to be me,
Longing to be free,
I stare at the open sky,
Hoping i can fly,
My feets in the air,
But it would go up only so high,
I am neither on the ground,
nor am i up high,
Desperate to be me,
Hoping to be free.

that is all.

Down down day

2004-10-08T00:45:00.000-07:00

I am feeling so down now, i need answers, to why i am so unlikable!!!!!!!!!!!! i am about to go mad, crazy, insane, and everything. i just need answers. i am losing myself, i am not me, i feel so out of place, i feel so left out everywhere, friends, family everything! i feel so alone, i feel so lonely.. I dont know , i have no answers, i only have a whole lot of questions!!!!!!!!! i just need answers.. anyone.....

multiple thoughts

2004-10-07T23:34:00.000-07:00

I have alot of things to say today, from yesterday (wed) till today, my mind is like a swiss bank, except it exchanges thoughts instead of money( i wish it could become money). So expect a long post(i'll try to shorten it), in chronological order.

>> Friends Advice <<

Today i managed to sit down with a friend of mine, we had a good chat about friends and life. We talked alot about the idea of evolution and how every has a different set of thoughts(systems) that differs with almost every individual . We went on to discuss how we integrate these systems on a one way traffic(ok this isnt maths) so that we can all be happy. I wont go into the details, but i've like to thank this friend of mine for being willing to open up and have a heart to heart(okay, mouth to mouth sounds more like it but anyway) chat which opened up many locks within my mind, and this perhaps, is the reason for the continuation of my thoughts for the following 24 hours.

>> Basketball <<

Ah my passion. Today training, i was the sole person there. But i had alot of time to think then. My coach told us to play 'hard' or in lay man term, rough. I got a chance to see a 5 - 5 game today, they were throwing elbows at each other and using every possible way to stop you from making a basket or stop you from stopping them make a basket.

My thought then was that, this was totally WRONG. Some may say, this is 'sissy' of not wanting to play rough, but thats totally not the point of argument i am bringing up. First we must understand why do we play? To injured someone? To get injured? To win? NO, we dont play to do either of these(these factors inter-link with each other, so no to one means no to all, unless you can do one without doing the other, like to win), we play to enjoy the game, to bath in the love for the game dissipated by every player on the court. We can get competitive, we can get physical at times, but we shouldnt bear hard feelings , because, we love the game and that is the primary core reason why we play.

Playing rough simply deter our primary objective, its totally 360 degree away from what we are going after. I think i made my point here. If only we all can accomplish that, the sports of basketball will become much more enjoyable.

>> Friends <<

I was reading this book i had a long time ago, and i decided to read it again, "Making Friends" by andrew matthiews, i was astounded by his principles, they were simple and yet profound. It was simple because they were all very fundamental concepts,but appeared profound because often we're clouded by our egos and thoughts(personality in short) to be able to carry out correct positive judgement. These lead me down to a series of thoughts, in pieces , i cannot bring them together because i cant express them in words. But i really do hope everyone could take a look at this book, and understand that what they are doing at times sometimes hurt people and that we should always try to understand people positively and why they are doing this instead of condemning them the moment they do something without clarification .

I think the basic principle of making friends would be to try to make them happy and to express your displeasure the best possible. When you're not happy with someone, it is very unethical to just keep quiet and start throwing cold shoulders or 'ignoring' that person. I feel that it is very incorrect to do this, especially if the other party hasnt know what he has done.

>> NBA live 2005 <<

Okay, i am going to do a bit of review for this game, because i really it was good.

Improvements:
--> More realistic lay ups and moves
--> Allows you to treasure low post players like Tim "Mr.Fundamental" Duncan , Shaquille O'Neal.
--> Blocks are more realistic which allows you to manuveur and create better rejections

thats about it for today's post

that is all.

2004-10-05T19:38:00.000-07:00

Ok i managed to and read all the comments that has been 'hidden' due to too many posts, saw rong ping comments and one from sam(my class mate). Okay to rong ping, thanks for answering, flattered about my blog. To sam i am happy to accept your reasoning ,because during the time i registered those posts till now, i've given it quite a thought, and i basically came to almost the same conclusion as you did.

>> If i may make a request to those who leaves comments, i would appreciate it if you state it in the chatter box below that you said something, sorry if its inconvinient for you but, because sometimes i scroll too fast(my bad on this) or i simply dont see clearly, i may miss your comments, but thanks for leaving comments!!! <<

Okay i am going to address something today which many have asked me about and i think i need to write it down in black and white(okay some green maybe?), so it serves as a constant reminder to me . I know what i am going to say below is gonna draw many arguments, but this is basically my stand, and i think it transcends many levels of debate.

Okay, the topic of a girlfriend, many have asked me why i dont have a girlfriend at this age?
Before we go into a relationship, we must know what we yield from a relationship, if i get into one at age of 14, how long is it going to last? what do we learn? what do we get? Depending on individual our length of relationship definitely differs , but i think we wont get married for sure. To me, getting into a relationship that young definitely will alter the course of my life, much attention will be spend on my girl and i will tend to neglect other things, which i feel is pretty important. allow me to tell you what i've learned during the time when others was dating, i've learned about integrity. maybe it seems totally unrelated, but if you have a girlfriend, you tend to neglect your family members beside you, maybe not all, but definitely some of us do that! So, we have just neglected our process of growing up through the process of learning from our elders and have channeled our energy towards our parthner. yes, you may say parents can give us advice on our relationship which will ultimately help us in our lifes, but these lessons can come later in life. During our growing up stage, our character develop, and we must'nt miss this chance to develop our character positively, we grow more mature and everything and having a girlfriend simply off set this balance that we' re supposed to have! Maybe you may not agree with me but thats my point. the others are those long winded stuff about not being matured enough and everything, but i shadn't mention that because i think you know it better than i do.
So like i said my argument transcend routine arguments, so i hope you follow me in my explaination.
Hope you learned something from my post.
do post your comments!
thanks

that is all.

ok in a really -1000000000% mood and needs to whine

2004-10-05T07:05:00.000-07:00

Okay, i am going to say this once again, and i cant say this enough. If you wanna train for a team for basketball, make sure you god damn consistent. Just because exams coming? come on man, thats complete excuse. Lets say you study 8 hours a day and you sleep 8 hours per day, you have 8 hours left per day, 2 hours to do everything you want , 2 hours to study , and you have 4 hours of free time, assuming during training days, you completely span your time to play bball, thats 4 x 5 = 20 hours per week of time you have, divide that by 7 and you get almost 3 hours per day(excluding the two days, if you include them you've probably clock 3.5 hours per day), 3.5 hours per day to study and you're complaining you have no time? Lets assume you span 1 hour of time per day per week for projects, you have 2.5/day for STUDIES!!!! For crying out loud, if you pay attention in class(which you're supposed to god damn do so), and you seriously hit the books, i think you have more than enough time to play around with. For myself, i pay attention in classes and make use of my break time in school(include that inside your studying time and you may well clock it up to 4 hours per day) to do homework and revisions or projects, man come on, if you have been bloody consistent you get 4 hours to study per day, thats basic maths, and base on a research by a scientist, only 2 hours of study is needed if you know proper studying skills, assuming you suck at that, for crying out loud, twice of that time isnt enough? I am saying this for all those idiots out there who create excuses for not wanting to do something because of EXAMS , twist that idea down side up and throw it into a bin. Its not even an excuse, its not a god damn trash excuse, its not fit to be called one and you jolly well stuff that stupid not fit to be idiotic trash junk thing up the side down you inflammed throat which spits nothing but trash. You give me that stupid excuse one more time and i'll blast you off my piece. You're not like a below average student that simply cant study, you're someone who scored well enough for your god damn course and you're god damn qualify to study it and for crying out loud what you're being tested has already been taught to you at tietary level and at secondary level, if you cant even god damn grasp that stupid concept and get your idea straight you god damn wont get enough of 24 hours perday dedicated to studies.i'll save my piece till here, you hear me freak jerk idiot, you hear me? ANSWER ME! You get this right into your head right now, get this blasting idea into your empty head, YOU HEAR ME! thats not even an EXCUSE! GET IT IN NOW!

that is all.

Productive thinking

2004-10-05T04:41:00.000-07:00

Today i thought i've liked to touch on a topic that has long been on my mind for like, years. Productive Thinking.
This is something i feel everyone should do, to get a most productive life and correct attitude.

Ok whats this all about? simple, learn from every living example, many a times, we leave out our thinking in certain things, for example, when we're watching Television, we should always think about why this happen and why that happen. When we see , for example , a divorce case on television, i dont know what goes through your mind, but what goes through mine is, what caused the divorce? What should each party have done to save the situation? What other factors contributed to the divorce? Is divorce the only way out? Well this may seem like alot , but in actual fact, all this happens in matter of minutes, and some, seconds. Next, when we walk on the street, you see say, someone littering. Many a times, we just accept it without further thought.But, we should, think, the consequences of such an act, should he have done it? What could he have done?

Okay, i think you get my point on productive thinking, maybe you may think, why must i think of all these? Why make life so hard? Okay, heres the reasons, firstly, if you think much, you'll find much 'enlightement' to many mysteries in life, you will get a better understanding of life , why some things happen. On the academic site(or working), it'll enable you to think quickly on your feet(because your mind is always active), and to be able to think out of the box. This is something that cannot be achieve unless you're talented.

One example i can give is, if a teacher teaches a very complicated concept, you're able to analyse(because your mind has always been doing that) and be able to grasp your teacher's point almost quicker than others who dont normally think. Because their mind has always been given the signal to 'ah forget it' . So if you dont think normally, this same signal goes to your mind when it comes to something that you are not so good with. this is a matter of habit.

I hope what i said today do help. Dont procastinate no more, go do some thinking, it'll aid your life like you can never imagine

that is all.

2004-10-04T21:19:00.000-07:00

bah, i have never been good with numbers, much less letters that are supposd to represent numbers, todays maths lessons got be baffled and once again reinforced my loophole of how bad i am with numbers, x y t u a b, man, for crying out loud, cant we get mathematicians to do the caculations and chemist to do the chemistry stuff? I would be very glad to leave all my caculations to the mathematicians, but i guess in this world, if you can do two things at one professoin(well maybe not me, someone else, he spoiled the market), why not? so here in DCP course(Diploma in Chemical Process), we're not only trained to be chemist, but mathematicians, and quite a expert in it. I hope i can complete this stage of evolution, otherwise i'll be those rejects of this course and be at mercy of others(ok, this may sound serious, but thats what i percieve).

okay, enough of those high end stuff of being some [mathemati]'cians' and [che]'mists', i think before we get to 'cians' and 'mists' lets look at something any kid down town would love, my new game, nba live 2005, oh man i am so impressed by what EA sports had install for nba live 2005, finally something realistic!! The lay ups are no longer the same whether you're on the break, under the basket, they differ and it seems more 'human' to me now. And now,the double teams more realistic then before, you dont just 'trap' the person, the person is allowed to manuveur through double teams , not just being 'trapped'. Just an update on my super-star:

:: Commentator ::
At 7 foot tall, your power forward from School of Germany, Dirk Nowitzzzzkiiiii...! (CHEERS)

Lets look at his status Mark, Nowitzki can pull up for three, put it on the floor and take it all the way to the hoop, or pull up from mid range, he gives his opponent alot of problems.

Points per game: 63.8
FG % : .545
3 pt%: .656
FT5: 96.8%
Rebounds per game: 6.5
Assists per game: 2.3
Blocks per game: 8.0
Steals per game: 3.6

This are MVP status numbers, but it didnt come easy for me.

that is all.

sad day

2004-10-04T05:27:00.000-07:00

Today was a totally outrageous day for me, first, i awaken to feel so tired i felt i was a rubber over-stretched, i went back to sleep all the way to 8am(thank sp for only have 4 practicals for mondays, they are all over). I awaken only to notice my fish tank is in a mess(obviously, the inhabitants of the tank did created it), i cleared the mess and next to find out that my grandma wants me to mop the floor!!!! oh my goodness, that was so not good,i kinda told her off, because she wanted to mop it AFTER school, i told her, no , i'll do it now.. she said no after school, so i told her that she can assign me a task, but please dont order me when to do it, dont forget its a favour not an order, then she wanted me to buy oil, oh how unlucky, i went downstairs to wait and wait and wait.....still waiting.. till i finally get that miserable bottle of oil..came back, with a little happy news(i'll get to that later), then i had to rush to school! i was late for lessons(20 minutes), and i had to skip mr jeffrey whey's lesson because shi long was having his N levels and i needed to clarify his doubts for him. I was looking forward to a movie, with my two friends, jun rong and gideon, oh my, was i terribly mistaken, jun rong had to take of his grandma(ok thats reasonable), then gideon had this stupid excuse of his friends bugging him or whatever, to me, was totally atrocious trash excuse.

OK today was supposed to be good, but as the above has stated it WAS NOT, a few consolations would be, i had got the newest game NBA live 2005, ok that was cool, and my internet came back(ok that was good too), thats about it..

I cant stress enough, please, if you make a promise, please stick to it. No reason about how your friends bugging you.. come on!!!! for crying out loud, that isnt even fit to be an excuse!!

i'll stop here, i think this post is gonna turn very nasty if i dont.

that is all.

Idea of revolution, the mike way

2004-10-01T21:15:00.000-07:00

There is no such thing as a perfect basketball player, and I don’t believe there is only one greatest player either. Everyone plays in different eras. I built my talents on the shoulders of someone else’s talent. I believe greatness is an evolutionary process that changes and evolves era to era. Without Julius Erving(Dr. J), David Thompson, Walter Davis, and Elgin Baylor there never would have been a Michael Jordan. I evolved from them. The presented a challenge, the example I could improve upon. I had the idea that “I have to be better than David Thompson. I have to be better than Julius Erving. I have to be better than [Earvin] Magic Johnson.” Those were guiding forces in my development and I used them as a motivation

If I had been born on an island, learned the game all by myself and developed into the player I became without ever seeing another example, the yes, maybe I would accept being called the greatest. But I have used all the great players who came before me to improve my skills. So I cant be the greatest. Its not fair to diminish them that way. The evolutionary process never ends. Somebody is going to improve upon my game. I don’t think I will live to see somebody score 100 points in a game again, but there will be players who evolve and move the game ahead. What could a player do to improve upon my example? They asked the same thing about Elgin Baylor(hall of famer) and Dr.J[ulius Erving]. And that the beauty of it all . No one knows.

We have seen different aspects of greatness In different bodies. Now we have seen many of those same aspects in one body. I’m certain down the road even more greatness will be seen in a single player. It used to be that great offensive players never played great defense. There was a driving force in me to prove that the notion was wrong. I proved a great offensive player can play great defense. But somebody will come along who plays even better offense and defense that me. The evolution of greatness doesn’t stop with me just as it didn’t stop with Baylor, Dr. J , Larry Bird or Magic [Johnson]. The nature of evolution is to continue. We have all passed something along through our performance and all that has been written.

Somewhere there is a little kid working to enhance what we’ve done. It may take awhile, but someone will come along who approaches the game the way I did. He wont skip steps. He will learn from my example , just as I learned from the others. He will master the fundamentals. Maybe he will take off from the free throw line and do a 360 in mid air. Why not? No one thought they would see a 6-foot-9(2.05m) point guard(Magic Johnson) or a 7-foot-7(2.31m) center(Yao Ming, Shawn Bradley).But here we are. There are now more 6-foot-10 perimeter players than at any time in history(Dirk Nowitzki). Magic would have been a center 30 century ago. Evolution knows no bound. Unless they change the height of the basket or otherwise alter the dimensions of the game, there will be a player much greater than me.

Scoring like Mike, 40 in a game

2004-10-01T21:14:00.000-07:00

THERES NOTHING EASY ABOUT LEADING THE NBA IN SCORING
(From For the love of the game- my story, Michael Jordan)
I know some players think they could do what I did if they had the kind of freedom I had. But they don’t even have a basic understanding of what it takes to be that consistent over the course of an 82 game season. Before the 97-98 season, Penny Hardaway(Orlando Magics) told me he was going to win the scoring title and average 40 points per game. Shaquille O’ Neal was gone and Hardaway figured he would have all the oppourtunities. He was serious, too. Do you know how hard it is to average 40 points? That’s 10 points a quarter of every game. And that’s just your average. Now, if you don’t score at least 10, the you have to score even more later.

You have to do that while the defense is completely focused on stopping you from scoring. That means you have to fight off double teams, get to the line, and knock down at least 80 percent of your free throws. All those things have to happen every single night. Scoring like I do doesn’t happen because a situation changes or a player decides to be more aggressive. You have to study the game , find opportunities. The opportunities you find one night might not be there the next. You have to figure ways to beat virtually everyone of your opponents because you can be darn sure that if you’re scoring that many points, every one of your opponents is going to make a point of shutting you down. You have to be aggressive at all times mentally, the pick and choose when to attack physically. These kids don’t understand that. They don’t have any understanding of the mental aspect necessary to score 40 points even one night.

You have to be able to adjust constantly. Do you come out at the beginning attacked to distort the entire game to your advantage? Do you try to get everyone else involved so that they become a threat and open the floor for you? I haven’t even talked about what you have to do at the defensive end to get easy baskets, break-aways ( fast breaks), all those situation play into a 32 point night. At this stage of they careers, guys such as Hardaway and Grant Hill are getting points strictly off physical talent. Now let’s move to the playoffs (some what like a championship elimination process),where you have to play the team as many as seven times. The adjustments have to come quicker, sometimes between plays. And you have to do all these things with the objective of winning the game. I don think any of them are ready for that.

Michael Jordan, My perfect idol of basketball

2004-10-01T06:13:00.000-07:00

Michael Jordan is my idol on and off the court. There are great players in the NBA league, but I only admire them for who they are on the court, off the court, they are just as ordinary as us, I do not admire them, not for their thinking, or their level of sportsman etcetera. Look at Allen Iverson, he’s a great player, but when it comes down to temper, he doesn’t have a good temper, he once changed to street-wear during a fourth quarter game due to some frustration with the coach. His explanation wasn’t very sufficient either.

Michael is a player whom I admire him for his determination and drive to succeed, he wants to prove to the world he can do it. He wants to be the best, hes competitive and I like that spirit in him. When he first came into the league, he had that humble attitude towards his career, he wouldn’t dress like a super-star, although he is the second highest paid member of the Chicago Bulls, he wouldn’t voice out his comments until he was given respect. He didn’t want to be in the spotlight, he wanted to live modestly. Despite his high pay, he never bought cars and house like rookies today do, he just wanted to blend in with the environment and not ‘stand out’ of the crowd.

When Michael came into the NBA, there was this rule that players are not allowed to play the game during off-seasons, fearing any injuries that may affect the regular season, because the NBA see every individual as the property of the franchise(in this case the Chicago Bulls), and the franchise has the right to tell you what you can and cannot do. But Michael signed a clause with the bulls when he entered the league called “Love of the game” clause, which would allow Michael to play during the off-season to work on his game, and also because he loved the game so much, he didn’t just play for the money but for the love of the game. At one time, when Michael’s agent felt that Michael should get a pay rise, there was a argument between the owner of the bulls and the agent , the owner felt that Michael was paid rightfully for what he has done for the franchise, but the agent felt that Michael was under-paid in the first few years of the league and should be compensated for (and also that he had just won a championship for the bulls), Michael said this to then owner(Jerry) “Look, Jerry. My agent is here. You are here. Why don’t we split it down the middle, shake hands and get out of here. I’m not here to rob you. I want you to know I live up to my end of the bargain. I did my job and all I’m asking for is a raise. That could be a dollar or $6 million. I just want an acknowledgement from you that I did my job”. That’s the spirit I admired, for the love of the game, he plays, not for money.

Michael’s aim when he entered the league was to reach the level that of Earvin “Magic” Johnson and Larry “Legend” Bird, two of the greatest player and most respected players in the league. Larry commented on Michael’s play as “ I couldn’t believe anyone could do this to the Boston Celtics(Larry’s team)”, Michael took it as a compliment, but he was never complacent, he worked at his game harder. During the first few seasons, Michael was seen as a offensive talent, he could score in many ways, he had a lot of weapons, the double-clutches, the high ‘flying’ dunks ,and all the reverse lays. But everyone said Michael couldn’t play defense, Michael want to prove these people wrong , he worked hard on playing defense and proved everyone wrong, he would block shots, get steals(led the league in steals), shut down opponents(like reggie miller), and offensively, he would totally break down his opponent. He averaged over 30 points for many seasons, it was not easy feat, 30 points per game for 82 games, do your maths and you know, you cant do that easily.

Michael also has great personality off the court, he wouldn’t refuse to sign any basketball given to him, he didn’t have the heart to reject people. He was also very loyal to Nike, he felt obliged. During the first all star game that Michael attended, he wore nike’s warm up Tee Shirt, he felt that since he was paid by nike to advertise, that was only respectful. He also has a mature look at the game, he understood the game. He knew how to get 40 points per game, it wasn’t as easy as it seems, it was a challenge. He also knows the idea of ‘revolution’ .

>> In the next post, I’ll post to articles of Michael Jordan, one describing how to score 40 points per game, and the other the idea of revolution <<

Results And Effect

2004-09-30T10:41:00.000-07:00

As the topic itself says, in life, we do many things, which bears us results and effects. Sometimes we overlook this point in our busy daily routine. We may be aware of this point(ok since i mentioned it you should know), but it lays only deep in our subconscious. Why am i bringing this point up? Because there are too many things in life where we consider only the results, but neglected its effect.We are TOO focused on NOW rather than FUTURE, this can be summarised into one word, procrastination, but procrastination is only a sub-topic of focusing on results and neglecting results.

Let me give you an example(well this example spurred me to put this post), my friend victor(no offenses man, just an example) said that he wears jacket to train to lose fats, well i do not deny that this MIGHT actually make you lose fats, but that result is so minimal and insignificant to the other effects it has produced.

1)What you lost is probably water, because of all the excessive sweating, you can lose up to 5kg of water(no kidding) within a few hours. --> or muscles, because you pushed yourself too hard to run, your body will automatically burn your muscles FIRST, because they're the second easiest source of fuel(secondary to our own stored energy).

2)Retention of heat within the body defeats the purpose of sweating, you trap the heat within the jacket, this can cause malfunction of certain organs

3)Sweat contains 'toxic', thats a natural way for your body to remove toxic from your body, retention of sweat , is as good as allowing this 'poison' seep back into your body.

As you can see, yes you do lose fats, but what you have done to your own body has immesurable effects on your body in the future!!!

Any good way to illustrate this would be food, we eat all kinds of junk food, i shadnt go into the details, but why are we eating all this unhealthy food? because we are focused on RESULTS, and what are they here? Satisfying our taste buds, because we are NOW hungry, we dont consider our FUTURE. Thats why we have alot of people down with cancer and other common disease like heart problems, kidney failure. You cant fail sick just like that, it takes alot of 'determination', 'hard work' and 'perserverance' to get sick. So you have actually worked very hard to get cancer by sending everything but the correct things into your body.

I am sure there are many examples where we focus on results rather than effect.
My stand is, i do not deny the results, but i also acknowledge the effects.
Analogy: Antibiotics can get rid of your fever, but if you always eat that whenever you're sick, your liver will suffer.

I hope this brings a food for thought for you today

that is all.

computer down...

2004-09-29T20:32:00.000-07:00

My internet access at home is down because of some problems, but i'll keep posting from school!

Yesterday(wednesday) training was a complete upset for me, because no coaches was there, one had to work overtime and the other was on an over-seas trip! but we did have a 3-3 game and some 4-4, they were generally just push-overs who likes to play around(un-serious), i did a few things i normally do, except, this time i try to learn to draw fouls using some hang-time and footwork. After that i had a one on one game with jerrome(that guy i mentioned before), this time i was healthy and well, i totally owned him. I used my handles on him(ball dribbling skills), i was the better athelete, but i beat him not using size or height, but speed and handles(which was supposed to be his fort being smaller). Not acting arrogant but well.. it was fun. I broke his ankles once, i hit him with a nasty cross-over, this is how it goes...

1) I hit it in him by faking right
--> he followed me right
2) Quickly, i cross it over to my left and brought the ball to above waist level
--> he quickly tries to recover by going left with me, un aware it was a fake
3) I hit him with a last nasty cross over which left his ankles broken

breaking ankles = make opponent unbalance

I didnt make the shot because i threw the ball out of bounds on purpose to show my superiority that i crossed him over! This is known as a streetball " spirit" that exist on the court, but he did pretty well after that, from a 4-1 deficiet, he came back strong to a 1 point lead at 8-7, in which after that i completely blew him over and emerge with victory, i must emphasis i am not trying to be arrogant but just noting my thoughts down!

After that we had some drinks at a nearby coffee shop and then left for home where i studied a little on transformers before i went to bed.

that is all

2004-09-27T21:04:00.000-07:00

I was thinking that this blog should get a little two way, so to my fellow readers, heres a little question which i would be very interested in seeing you reply.

What does a
)Friend
)Good Friend
)Best Friend

mean to you?

Look Forward To Your Reply!!!(leave it in the comments box)

that is all.

Tribute to my teachers of BBSS

2004-09-27T04:33:00.000-07:00

I felt a little sentimental today(well i know i am always...), so i decided to give all my good teachers a tribute, if you asked me about them in person, and i got into it, i've probably cry.(sentimental nature)

Ok, lets begin with my favvvvourite teacher,

Madam Yaw Lai Teng

Subject: Chemistry

Age: Undefined

Description: Kind typical kind lady, with white hair mixed with black which flows down to her ear, two pretty average sized eyes, wear specs with gold frame and prefers skirt.

Why I like her: Superb interest in her job in educating, never failing to inspire students, has students best interests at heart, will not give in to students as she knows its as good as digging their graves.

Speciality: Setting extremely difficult tests ,record: 3 express classes took her test on Organic Chemistry, one scored distinction with a score of 18/25 (72/100), you may think thats not too impressive, but it is! because ,all others failed, i mean ALL others, 90 students, i passed, over 3/4 scored single digit.

Favourite phrases/sentences: "That kind" , "Do you see that now class?" , "Never make a woman angry"

Mrs Woo Ai Ling

Subject: Mathematics

Age: Over 1 years old

Description:Black Curly hair sets down on her rosy cheeks, wrinkles can be seen on her face, reflecting not age, but experience. Pair of glasses, with those eyes ready to catch you up to no good.

Why i like her: She has a relentless energy for her profession, would do everything for her students(ok i mean everything!!), she would personally staple the test papers herself(doesnt sound much, but she can always delegate, stay back till late hours just to teach us - even if she was sick , always looking our well being as a whole.

Specialty: Ultra efficient with the (O)ver (H)ead (P)rojector, great at explaintions, if you listen

Favourite sentence: None

Mr Tan Peng Yeong

Subject: Physics

Description: big eyes, that almost can gobble you up, the rest.. like any other male teachers

Why i like him: Extremely resourceful!!!!!! Oh my goodness, theres nothing he doesnt know(almost), hes good at everything (almost)!! He would teach in the most creative manner, our physics text books became antique the day after our first day of school, available for re-fund after a year. He would print notes for us(from his own power point slide) and started explaining from his notes. He would make us see subject in a circular way(ok talk about think out of the box.. he makes you think out of the circle), and because of this, he is extremely fast at covering syllybuas, he once came into lesson and ask " What do you all wanna do today, we've already finished our syllubuas", ya you got it!!! one more thing, we dont go "good morning....mr tan.." , he says 'Hi' and we reply "hi" .

Speciality: Too many too write.. might as well dont list

Favourite sentence: "Hi"

thats the top three teacher on my list, enjoy:)

that is all.

My wonderful dad

2004-09-26T16:57:00.000-07:00

I thought i wanted to talk about my dad today, because hes been the reason why i am here today. Hes the best dad....(ok all the formal stuff you read everytime people starts talking about their love ones.)

Most father and son quarrel in today's society, over trivial matters, over studies matters, and some just plain mis-understanding. But my dad and I are kinda special, we never had any arguments before, we would never scream at each other, or ignore each other(cold war). We would talk everything out and he would listen, i would accomdate. I love basketball, he knows i love basketball, he never forbid me to play basketball, place a curfew, drew up a plan(eg. every 1 hour study = 1/2 hour bball) or limit my days of play(or hours, except maybe not beyond 8pm for safety reasons). I dont remember the last time he refused to let me out for bball without a VALID reason, now whats VALID?sickness, rain , some epidemic disease like SARS, injury(ankle ones) , those to me are VALID as well. So we kind of a came to terms on these. These not only applies to basketball, my general freedom as well, he would allow me to go anywhere i wish(ok maybe not EVERYwhere, but anywhere reasonable), as far as i know how to manage my time. He always reminds me that " You gotta manage your own time, set your priorities right, studies always comes first", i love him for that, because he has given me due respect as a growing adult to handle my own time managment , this has made me mature quite a lot, positively.

My dad and i dont spend alot of time together, because of his busy work schedules, but deep in my heart i always love him, i know hes working hard for my sake and my future education. I on the other hand, would fulfill my duty as a child, and do well in my studies(i think i havent let him down in this aspect) , be filial and generally be a good boy. I must admit i dont give my dad major headaches like defiance and everything. One example of the respect i have for my dad would be , if he ever asked me not to do certain things, and i agree to it, i WONT do it. He once told me not to go west mall, due to some reasons, i agreed and i didnt go, although it would have been possible for me to 'cheat' on him and go there.

father and son must cooperate to communicate better, sometimes, the parents are overly jumpy, but the child has a part to play in this as well. As children, we're supposed to be filial towards our parents. Lets not give them more headaches (as if they dont have enough)!!! Lets just be good boys and girls, go with your parents, dont listen to those outside rumours of " oh i am all grown up and they have no right over us" i HATE to hear this setence, how can you say something so irresponsible like this! Parents bother only because they care, you can make it known that you do not want to be constricted , but on your part you must also assure them that you wont go mixing with all the wrong company.

This is a matter of mutual respect, parent respect child, child respect children. Either party has to take the initiative, why not you?(no, dont say why not the other party). So i hope this story may inspire you to build a better relationship with your kin.

that is all.

CD, never fail to be interesting

2004-09-23T20:52:00.000-07:00

today , is another day of (C)haracter (D)evelopment module, where Mr Nee(ph) will lead us down the road of today's society and how we can better develop ourselves as a whole. He described something that i found very interesting, and it doubly agrees with what i already had in mind from before. He mentioned that youngsters nowadays are educated but not well nurtured. Education by dictionary definition is the learning of something, for example, if you go for a maths lesson, the teacher(educator) is suppose to educate you on maths. (by western definition that is).

however, by chinese context, or eastern contextthe word 'jiao yuo' (education in chinese), jiao means to education, and yuo, is to nurture and up-bring the children so that they being equiped with the knowledge education brings them may be a pillar to tomorrow's singapore, not a decay in it. A few good examples i quote off the list would be lack of responsibility, teenagers nowadays simply lack responsibility, therefore , the term 'pang seh'(to agree on something and to later back out without a good reason) has surfaced in today's society, lighty put. But, the degree in which responsibility is lacking has became wide spread, so much that its no longer abnormal to be not punctual, but in a habit it has already become, its the norm. Schools now give grace for being late(poly 15 minutes), and if you are ever late for lesson in secondary schools, the teachers just forget it. In my opinion, a student should never be late, unless a very sufficient reason is given, for example, if a student is late the first time, reason, bus met with a jam. This reason shouldnt be quoted again, because, if you know the bus is going to jam, or has a mathematical probability chance of getting caught in a jam, you should jolly well get off your beds earlier, and get to school earlier. Unforseen circumstances like car accidents should be accepted as fairly good reasons. Society is promoting the growth of this epdemic disease!!! Responsibility! what i mentioned is but a tip of an ice berg!

After that, Mr Nee went on to love, talking about how divorce rates has increased, i wont go into it, but , lack of responsibility is also a major factor in causing such a phenomenon. One example i would like to quote would be that , 20 years ago, people work on business base on vocal agreement, now, everything MUST be stated down in black and white, this clearly reflects the progression(or degression) of today's society. I leave it up to everyone to imagine, this reflection, its magnitude.
Hope what i say brought some caution to everyone and me alike.

training sick

2004-09-22T07:55:00.000-07:00

Today wasnt a very good day, but i would say its a day filled with multiple emotions, happiness, fun, anger, and something else. School was totally insiginificant to mention yesterday(except with the 'war' during a debate with wei zhong, that , i define as, FUN, no hard feelings).

So as usual i was down at the court(yuhua CC, although i must say, i dont go there much ) playing with my ex-school mates(bukit batok secondary), and we were having some great fun, after that i met my friend jerrome, so we went ahead to block 108 court to play because it was over-crowded at yuhua CC, there i met my coach ah siao(yes him again), fun loving he was then, we cracked alot of jokes and we basically had fun talking, and we also had fun at the court!

After that got home for dinner and went ahead for training, before training commence, jerrome wanted a one on one game with me, although i was sick(thats the main point of this post), i agreed, as my defense wasnt tight enough due to fatigue, he got a 4-0 run on me, but once i gained possession i made every point count, and won 7-4(race to 7 points ).

Training was pathetic, only 4 person turned up, so we had some basic lay up drills,shooting drills and finally 3-3 game to end the day. What angered me then was that jerrome, was totally retarded when playing, he was laughing like a clown which made everyone irritated , and he wasnt serious at all. On top of that, he didnt use his brains to play, one very good sentence to describe " He doesnt know his basic passes, but already want to make MAGIC passes" , i think thats sufficient to describe the level of his play. He was completely outplayed by shi ping, whom was the better athelete , player, in terms of atheleticism, physicalness and skills, at the LOW POST! jerrome was taller, bigger and stronger, but, he got owned at where height, size and strength mattered most, describing any further would make him worth less then a penny.

That concludes my day for wednesday.

that is all.

importance of secondary school education

2004-09-21T06:43:00.000-07:00

Today i learned how important is what our secondary school teachers have taught us, the knowledge, academically and socially , the dos and donts. What got me sentimental was a very simple knowledge, filing, yes you got that, FILING. You may think 'big deal', well thats what i thought from before - no more. Life in poly is hectic, as an adult(maybe growing one), you are already expected to know what to do, not told. The amount of worksheets we get is uncountable, notes, work, and everything!!! I looked at them today, and told myself , this isnt the way, i am going to go crazy if i were to spend 1 hour looking for my dear tutorial!!!

Hence, i went ahead and bought files today(S$10), and began to organised my notes and stuff, i was taken aback, it took me one full hour to get my notes organised! , and i am only into week 12 of my semester(first year), can you imagine that? if i didnt bother to arrange it, i am going to be going bonkers during my semestral exam! not because i am not good, i am lazy or what, its because too much time is spent on looking for notes, is it really worth the time? So why not lets just all get organised, this way, we make study much more productive.
TRIBUTE TO THE BEST TEACHER I HAD
Sorry, allow me to get sentimental again, i really miss my teacher madam yaw(LT) from Bukit Batok Secondary School, she was the best teacher i have had, i remember she told us ' The first step to getting an A in your O levels is nothing, but getting organised, if you cant even get organised, forget about your A', that etched into my memory, because i couldn't agree more with her!!!

She was also that kind of teacher whom would go all out to help you, she would be going around printing other schools prelimary papers for us(during O levels years), and i knew how hard it was on her, maybe others didn't notice, but i noticed , her face was much stressed up than before. Then she would write(YES WRITE, not just take the standard answer), on a piece of foolscape and gave it to us, that means, for every paper we did , she did it too!!! What a teacher, and i would always remember when she say, " During your O levels theres nothing i can do to help, only thing maybe, divine intervention, i'll pray at home , and start worrying if my student remembered what i taught them" . Dear Madam Yaw, this is a tribute to you, i miss you alot, i hope this spirit of yours will continue and inspire your colleagues as well, you are indeed the greatest teacher.
TRIBUTE TO THE BEST TEACHER I HAD

That is all.

Sick.. Again!

2004-09-20T03:09:00.000-07:00

The feeling of fatigue , depressed , jumpy and lack of appetite; I was forced to relive these feelings yesterday(Sunday)! I woke up from my air conditioned bedroom(i forgot to mention how much i dislike air cons when i am sweating), my throat felt like it was being filled with coarse sand(yes COARSE), i ignored the discomfort and went on to prepare for the day's training. The bus trip was insiginificant, other than the irritating feeling of my throat.

I was pleasantly surprised to find one of my team mates(yun sheng aka harry) to be already there, because i was usually the first and the earliest(lets not talk about the coach). So we began to train and from there i already knew there was something amiss with my body, i felt exceptionally weak, de-hyrdated , i couldnt sum up any strength during the 5 on 5(i was so weak i didnt even bother to jump for a rebound), i couldnt take that unbearable feeling.

After training, i had my lunch (less meat more vegetables) , i was feeling very very weak already then, i decided to try and sleep.. but my throat was feeling terrible by now, i simply couldnt ignore the pain ! I waited till my parents were home informed them about my situation, i tried to self medicate, but to no avail.

A little something more interesting would be that i was helping my mom with a chore(cant say what) , but it definitely made me feel a little better.. but after that i felt sick again... Thats the last straw i told myself.. and i went to the doctor whom prescribed medication for me and an Medical Certificate for today.

Feeling sick wasnt fun, especially when you're living in the shadows of hospitalisation but just months ago!(due to dengue fever) That undescriable fear of re-living those days was unthinkable!

Thank fully, i am feeling better now and this has given me a reminder to take god care of my health in future, because, i swear never to enter a hospital and stay there again, its horrible!!! Also, this re-inforce one concept i always believe in, if you are not sick, it doesnt mean you are healthy, it only means you are NOT SICK, not HEALTHY. Few people are healthy nowadays

>>> TAG BOARD ADDED FEEL FREE TO DROP IN YOUR COMMENTS THERE <<<
that is all.

picture of the month!

2004-09-16T04:53:00.000-07:00

/jo_nodunk_ipg.ipg">

Content filled lesson

2004-09-15T22:23:00.000-07:00

This morning seemed like every other, my eyes awaken to that familiar scent and the 'clanking' of the house as my father prepares his day just like me. I thought about today's lesson and the first thought that came to my mind ' Oh man, three lessons in a row, thats going to be a torture' , subsequents thought filled my mind which were insignificant went on till i reached school, the first lesson was AE & E, boring.. but oh well, i learned something new.

Next came character development, well i have always found that this module has been a very good module to induce personal integrity within our students today as the society is changing quickly, rapidly and sad to say , badly. Our youngsters today lack a few core values like personal integrity, filial piety , responsibility, punctuality and many others. I dont understand why some students think that this module is a waste of time, but i personally feel its one of the most important module that will ensure the prosperity of singapore in the near future(maybe i may sound exaggarative, but trust me , its not). My teacher , Mr Nee, mentioned a few points thats worth remembering today and maybe because what he said has happened on me before, so i got a little emtional(i didnt show it of course).

What he said was about time managment, a common topic, a easy enough topic to understand, a simple task to do if its a habit. But many do not understand the essence of time managment and responsibility. The example that he mentioned that i would like to bring up would be balancing sports and studies. He said that if you are playing competitively in sports and studying as well you must learn to balance this two aspects. For example, if you have a test on tuesday and you have to go for training(whatever sports), you cannot skip training on monday saying that you have a test on tuesday! Thats not even fit to be an excuse! because if you know you have a test on tuesday, you should've made the effort to prepare for it , jolly well knowing you have a training on monday.

Ok now why i felt emotional here? ok let me explain my case(well thats what a blog is for, and sorry for the long introduction). I have trainnig with my team on wednesday and sundays. People often miss training for both days, sometimes the reason they give is really stupid, they would say ' i have a project to do' ' i have homework to do' 'i have a test tommorrow'. Why do i say this is stupid? You know you have training on wednesday, and yet you leave your homework to wednesday night to do it?(training is at night). What were you doing the whole afternoon? sleeping? resting? watching TV? playing games? hanging out with friends? Presumably you really have no time! Then simple, you can always do it after training ! you complain about fatigue, then for good heaven sake, request early leave from training! By joining the team, it is your commitment to come for training on time, its your responsibility!!! People just dont see that!! They feel " the coach is training me for free, bah, if i am not there, there are so many other people else" , thats a highy irresponsibly thing to say! Like what my ex-coach once mentioned, if you can miss training when you jolly well know and your excuse is you have homework, i can miss training giving the reason, my grandma is going to give birth that day. why? because homework is something you know you have to do, grandma giving birth? thats unpredictable, so if you can skip training due to something known, i can skip training(firmly too) base on a unforseen circumstances.

Oh and on top of this, please, if you cannot make it for training, please be courteous enough to informt the coach, PERSONALLY (if possible). If you have spammed his phone beyond hope, send him a sms, if you have flooded his sms box, please continue to try and contact him! Dont forget , its your RESPONSIBILITY!

drop me a hola:)
that is all.

sleep

2004-09-15T06:37:00.000-07:00

Hi, just to let all of you guys out there know, sleep is very important, dont think that lack of sleep will only result in lack of energy, it brings down your immunity system , why? because your body fix your immunity system between 9-11pm, even though you may not want to sleep at 9pm, but may it a point to REST, otherwise, this will majorly hit your immunity system which will ultimately lead to compliacted problems.

i am reading a health book now, written by a very known doctor which provide background statistics, bible arguments, and many supporting facts, that makes it very credible. i'll share with you guys what he mentioned in the book as i read along.

CANCER, what is it?
Cancer is actually our saviour, cancerous cells were actually normal cells, but because out blood has been 'toxified' , if these cells dont 'sacrifice' themselves to surrond this 'toxic' stuff, we would die perhaps in 3-4 days or at most 3 weeks!!!
So tumour forms(this cells surrond the toxic) and gives us time to clear our blood streams, through a change in food, and mood etc.
once our blood is cleared, this will allow us to recover.
Deep fried food

And you thought they only gave you extra fats? think AGAIN! Deep fried food not only makes you fat, but promote growth of cancerous cells, fries fried till golden brown contains 400 times cancerous products than that allowed by W.H.O. !!!

theres many other things we shouldnt eat,
like egg, milk and meat, they are all high in cholestrol, not good, this makes us feel tired!!
for buddhist: vegeterian
christains: Somewhere in the bible(i dont know where, but its stated in the book i read), " Anything that contains blood and cholestrol(fats), dont take them!"

no soft drinks either, soft drinks acidify our body(hence making a nice enviroment for cancerous cells to grow) and cause a loss of calcium and shut down immunity systems
just a nifty night reminder

friendship?

2004-09-15T05:52:00.000-07:00

At times i really do question whether my sacrifices i made for my friends, the effort i put in to be-friend them is really worth it. I really do not understand my friends, i always put them in place number one, if they wanted something, i would go out of the way to get it for them, if i was asked to help, i would definitely give it 101%, if my friends asked me a question, i would definitely reply it to my fullest, if my friend is in doubt, i surely will clear his doubts, if my friend is feeling down, i would stand by him and let him know i am there. But, the return i get(not that i am supposed to expect but i mean, after doing everything?), is something totally opposite of how i treat them.

Take a female friend in my secondary school for example, i treated her well, i would go all the way to the canteen to buy her recess because shes busy and everything stated above, in the end? she would give me the cold shoulder and ignore me at times! I dont get it!

Maybe you say, hey people change? Ok heres another one , it happened just today, was this guy in my class , after class, i asked him if he wanted to pay a teacher a visit as it will be her last day in school, he replied ' i am not sure,lets ask the class', i said 'alright, can you ask the class then?' , after that, he didnt ask the class, didnt give me a satisfactory reply and just walked off, i dont know, maybe its just me, thats known as 'cold shoulder' , 'uncourteous' , 'ill-mannered' , 'uncivillised' ? what else? I simply dont get it , if anyone were to ask me such a question, i would definitely say yes or no and give a satisfactory reason if i were to reject.

I really feel very betrayed , backstabbed, unappreicated when i do much for my buddies and friends and yet they treat me in this manner, i had once tried to ask myself whether its my fault,but after 5 years of thinking, i really think i have changed whatever that needs to be changed, i did well in secondary, i was cool with my buddies, they really treated me with RESPECT, i just feel un-respected in the singapore polytechnic, and i am really upset by the many experiences in the school, is it the practicality of society manifesting within schools? or is it just the generation wave has swept across the schools? i am definitely positive that 10 years before, people were much more friendly then they are today! Sometimes, i just feel like sleeping in in and skip school, because i no longer enjoy my days in school, everyday is a torture, an oven, slowly cooking me , i no longer have the passion to go to school, i no longer yearn to meet my classmates, because i feel betrayed by how they are treating me, i cannot express this to them as they may say 'its your problem for being so friendly', i have kept this to myself for a long time , and now its time i let it all out.

anyone with any idea of this phenomenon, please leave a comment.
thanks

that is all.